My conspiracy theory is that MANY people in NYC have, beneath their projected mask of cold indifference, a soft side that would gladly make a connection with a friendly, safe, and interesting stranger. Unfortunately the logistics and risks of passing 1000 people per day with anything but a "don't talk to me" face prevent this from happening. We should do more to make spaces that allow us to overcome this barrier.
I love meeting new people with my entire being. I talk to everyone and have so many wonderful connections because of it. It’s an art, one must know how to enter a conversation and when to exit it. Never overstaying your welcome or coming on too strong. I think everyone in NY should be friends and I wish every weekend the entirety of prospect park was a picnic that anyone could join.
Aug 21, 2024
Aug 21, 2024
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I love meeting new people with my entire being. I talk to everyone and have so many wonderful connections because of it. It’s an art, one must know how to enter a conversation and when to exit it. Never overstaying your welcome or coming on too strong. I think everyone in NY should be friends and I wish every weekend the entirety of prospect park was a picnic that anyone could join.
Aug 21, 2024
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the single greatest thing about new york city is the random conversations about random shit with random people, and how nice so many people seem to be at their core. having lived there and a few other places i believe it to be pretty unique to New York. its special man
Apr 26, 2024
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TLDR: there are friends everywhere for those with eyes to see
I think one consequence of urbanism is a sense of alienation or otherness from one’s neighbors, and especially from strangers. the average person you pass on the street is assumed to have little in common with you with which to establish a mutual connection. maybe this is a consequence of me living in the south, but i’ve been finding that most people are happy to start a light conversation in public.
ive been making a practice of being in public spaces with a posture of openness to interaction. no earbuds in, making light convo with people like service workers that goes beyond the transaction, striking up convos with people who are sharing a space i’m in, etc. most recently I stopped on a park bench at a skatepark during a bike ride and struck up a convo with a skater who beefed a trick and was describing in great detail how it happened and his history with skating. shout out cole I hope your collar bone isn’t broken.
these aren’t the same as a deep, intentional community that one has with close friends/peers (that comes from seeking out, plugging in, and showing up consistently), but seeing everyone around you as a possibility for human connection until proven otherwise makes one feel less lonely. there’s an intentionality in having a posture of openness to connection that can become a self fulfilling prophecy. it’s easy nowadays to feel like we live in social archipelagos, with our own clusters of friends and loved ones with little connecting each group to each other and little connection to others everywhere around us. but your average person is just as interesting and worth getting to know as anyone else. be curious, be cordial, and start integrating casual momentary connections into your life to tide you over between the deeper relationships in your life you might not have access to all the time
May 4, 2025
