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after my super scientific research of going to every single branch of the nypl this is the best. it’s in the main schwarzman branch but you have to walk through another room to get to it + you need a library card (you just have to ask and they’ll sign you up for one!!). also if you want to read any periodicals but don’t wanna pay BOOM they have them. i’ve started going on mondays so i can read the sunday paper from the day before. i feel excellent in there. perfect balance of pretty, quiet, and exclusive.
Jan 29, 2024
Related Recs
nypl’s main branch but ironically there aren’t really books for you to check out these days lol. a particular highlight is the reading room (pictured). there’s also a small (but very cool) museum exhibit that has stuff like the original winnie the pooh characters, lots of historical political pamphlets, some art, old religious / botanical / astronomical texts, first edition of a vindication of the rights of women, and more.
if you want to actually check out books, there’s another library building across the street lol, it is modern and kinda cool but not as beautiful
Mar 28, 2025
All of them but the Stephen A. Shwarzman building has a special place in my heart.
When I did my new york residency I spent so much time in the library. I was so broke and it was free and I could spend hours in the presence of other people without any obligation of actually socialising. Every trip I would go to the cafe and buy an espresso, plan my research in the cafe, wander around the gift shop planning what I would eventually buy to take people home, then go into a reading room to plan artworks and learn. The Treasures exhibition was so beautiful (I cried when I saw the real life Winnie the Pooh). Really feels like a peaceful place to sit and think or wander around. I genuinely think about how much I miss my trips there near daily.
Apr 3, 2024
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they’re constantly at risk of being defunded (particularly now in nyc), but they’re one of the last free third spaces left that’s accessible no matter the season (of life or the year). learn something and meet someone new (get to know your local librarian). public parks are also wonderful in the spring and summer, and always check if there’s any free museums near you
Jun 10, 2024
Top Recs from @mdoinurmom
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if you think you’re the smartest person in your friend group you’re weird and annoying. the best friendships come out of mutual awe and respectability. be friends with people who make you want to know more things.
Jan 29, 2024
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i will never be in a situationship in the same way i will never be in the land of oz--it's just not real. i think using the word doesn't let you self-reflect in a way that is truly helpful. i was telling my friend about the awkwardness of seeing an exhook up in a relationship bc i thought we had mutual feelings and she said "oh your exsituationship" and i thought (for the first time) no, we had clear boundaries i just got my hopes up. my point is that instead of using situationship as a catch-all for not quite dating or wtv failed prospect, take it as a moment to reflect on what exactly went wrong. idk if this is profound or not
Jan 30, 2025
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idk if any of this will be remotely helpful, but this is generally how i see socializing
to find friends:
1. do something consistently
2. do something where other people are also (generally) by themselves
3. do something that requires discussion
exercise classes, coffee shops, open studios, libraries, organizing/protesting/charity work; really to acquire friends you just have to do things that's it. do things you like so you are around people who share similar interests and thus will have a higher "friend hit rate" but really the most essential point on the list is the first one (the other two are nice bonus'). with enough consistency you become noticed and then boom.
on becoming friends:
1. open invites
2. follow ups
now that you've just met some people, get them into your circle by open inviting them to things. if you're going out later that night, offer for them to join. if you're both in a pottery class maybe offer an open invite to a gallery you're visiting. this is how you shift casual acquaintances to actual friends. the important thing is to concretize your plans tho. you're not trying to pressure them but you do want to make them feel like it was more than just a vapid offer, so after you suggest it wait a bit and follow up with details. this also goes for the reverse of being given an open invite.
on being friends:
1. do
the best piece of advice (which might have come from pi.fyi) is that sometimes you just need to be the doer. maybe you see a tiktok about a picnic with friends and you think dang wouldn't it would be cool if my friends did that. well, there's nothing stopping you, you have to be the friend that does stuff. obviously this is a little time consuming and exhausting but generally people want to pay it forward so once you get the ball rolling on the friend group doing stuff, people usually follow suit
also fear is the mind killer, go forth and be
Jan 27, 2025