Okay so word on the street is that my piece for liminal mischief is dropping soon so keep an eye out
And I was in fact a wee bit sloshed in the course of writing it and was going to post a rec about writing drunk like Hemingway. but I discovered in the course of my preliminary factcheck that this may not even be true and Hemingway may in fact have only only been a recreational alcoholic.
But I leave you with these words from Gore Vidal, professional hater, my literal kin and most favorite alcoholic of all time:
āWell, almost all American male writers are alcoholic, and as a result of the alcohol they become less capable sexually as they get older. They also become confused about which is their penis, which is their pen. Think of all those clones of Hemingway, drinking and worrying - fortunately they write very little.ā
Jun 17, 2024
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Iāve written drunk and seen no improvement. I occasionally have a little cocktail as a treat while Iām writing. But itās a treat not an aid.
Jun 17, 2024
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made me wish i was a journalist for a shitty newspaper in puerto rico drinking rum and smoking cigarettes all day. hunter s thompson is a legend.
Nov 5, 2024
imagine crafting with your bare hands the perfect life, or maybe even an imperfect one full of flaws and fuckups, but it's yours, and it's okay because you're full of love. imagine that you filled yourself with that love though, that you're overflowing with it and, cup running over, imagine sharing a taste of your beautiful messy life with somebody else, and whether they end up drunk on you, or needing you like water, or poisoned, know your cup won't empty as long as you keep refilling it with yourself. its 3:30 am and im sleep-deprived so this is one of those, maybe better in the drafts posts. stay thirsty, my friends.
Feb 26, 2025
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āLife shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.ā
ā AnaĆÆs Nin
This is uncharacteristically raw and personal, even for me, and pretty heavy! I know many of you have seen me posting through it and I feel safe to talk about it openly now that Iāve safely landed at the start of my new life. Itās honestly even a little bit embarrassing but I think itās important to share.
Iāve never publicly mentioned it on here, but I have a husband; as of Friday, weād have been together for 11 years, and weāve been married for 3 years as of 2/22. I realize now that I wanted to explore what I looked like outside of my relationship with him because I had lost that. This is why PI.FYI has been so meaningful to me as a space to express myself and connect with peopleāto rediscover my voice.
I had been living a lie this entire time, to others but worst of all to myself. Heās been verbally and emotionally abusive, physically but without touching me, to the point that every day I spent with him I was in danger. Iāve been shrinking myself and walking on eggshells to avoid making him insecure and provoking his casual put-downs and fits of rage, while hanging on for dear life to the threads of good I could see.
Iāve wanted so badly to leave, more than anything, but I felt like there was no way out and that this was just something I would need to endure indefinitelyābut someone who is so very dear to me helped me see that I have wings to fly, not by acting as my savior but by reminding me of my own power. The emotional safety they built and the gentle care they showed me made me feel like I could open up to them. With their encouragement I was brave enough to tell the truth to my friends, my family, my boss, and they have received me with warm, loving and open arms and rallied to support and protect me. The financial andĀ logistical aspects were the most intimidating to me and itās going to be tough for a while but Iām going to be better than okay!
Now Iām opening up to you. This isnāt the only abuse Iāve suffered in my life, and my old therapist told me she believed it was my mission to share my strength and light with others to inspire them and show them that change is possible.
I hope that by sharing this, I can reach even just one person who is going through something similar and show that they are not alone, and they are not weak. People with certain backgrounds may be more vulnerable to abuse, but it can happen to anyone. It thrives in darkness, shame, and isolationāand breaking that silence is the first step toward freedom.
Leaving is the scariest thing I have ever done but I have so many angels around me, and I am endlessly grateful. Thank you for being here with me š
Mar 16, 2025
My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebodyābe it a relative or one of my best friendsāwas to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too š
Feb 23, 2025
Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ā
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Feb 27, 2025