Sometimes I wonder if I should be medicated
If I would feel better just slightly sedated
A feeling comes so fast and I cannot control it
I'm on fire, but I'm trying not to show it
As it picks me up, puts me down
It picks me up, puts me down
Picks me up, puts me down
A hundred times a day (…)
I'm always running from something
I push it back, but it keeps on coming
And being clever never got me very far
Because it's all in my head
And "You're too sensitive", they said
I said, "Okay, but let's discuss this at the hospital" (…)
Is this how it is?
Is this how it's always been?
To exist in the face of suffering and death
And somehow still keep singing
Jun 20, 2024
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This song has kept me alive more times than I’d care to remember or mention!
“I hear what you want,
And I feel that way”
Oct 17, 2024
I’ve thought about this waaaaay too much.
at the end of my movie, im old, completely alone, and dying of lung cancer. in the hospital, my heart flatlines. The nurse has left the room, busy with other patients. No one notices I’ve died.
This song starts playing. the credits start rolling over the following scene:
cut to me on a vast, empty road somewhere in rural idaho. a border collie leads me down the vacant road. she runs back and forth across the road, barking at me, telling me to keep following her. we are utterly free. no one but the two of us. i smile.
Jul 19, 2024
I caught a cold earlier this week and decided to ignore its subtle, yet deleterious and lingering effects on my body. On the fourth day (yesterday), after high-intensity training and taking two capsules of psilocybin, I decided to drive to the local café to put in some more work. I’d been listening to this song all day—my head was rolling. If there was ever a moment that I’d felt closer to damnation, it was when I walked into the building and wished for complete annihilation. This isn’t anything new—I’ve experienced these episodes on and off since I was a child. But something about this particular bout made me realize I should be grateful, judge less, and have mercy. I called loved ones to tell them how sorry I was for words I’d said and actions I committed that may have hurt them—almost as a final act of salvation before my ultimate oblivion.
I met Lucifer at the bleeding edge, shrieked into the void—with one last gesture of love, forgiveness, and meaning—and anchored myself back to earth.
—
This song is something potent!
22h ago
Top Recs from @thickrimmedgirl
bc it’s what I originally wanted when I first went to college at 17 but I was scared to make writing my job and got a B.S. in Nutrition instead lol
Now the goal is an eventual PhD in Victorian Literature but I’m just happy to have made it through this part at 32!
Stacked is everything I read in my English courses—barely pictured are the 5 stuffed accordion folders of other reading materials under my chair haha
May 16, 2024
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the only place i win the social interaction
Aug 21, 2024
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conflusional. delonfident, even
Oct 1, 2024