Related Recs

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nothingness of being

this quote from Jessica DeFino, beauty reporter and more importantly, critic, on the one person from her past that most influenced who she is today (and I really must agree): "I am going to take the phrase “who you are today” very literally and go with Harry Dean Stanton — specifically, Harry Dean Stanton in conversation with David Lynch; that famous interaction where David Lynch says “How would you describe yourself?” and Harry Dean Stanton says, “As nothing. There is no self,” and they laugh.  I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of the self today for an article I’m writing on beauty as so-called “self-care” and “self-expression.” I bristle when people use these terms because in order for beauty products to be a tool for self-expression, you first must have a self to express, and I get the overwhelming sense that most people saying this don’t know who they are outside of what they buy and apply. Beauty products are more often used to create an image of a self than express an existing self. I don’t know. I’m taking a class on existentialism and Simone de Beauvoir, so that has something to do with it. But the more I think and read about the self, the more I’m convinced there is no essential self, not in any way that matters, and pursuing solidarity with the collective is a more interesting and liberating project than defining the self anyway? So yeah, today, specifically, I am luxuriating in the nothingness of being with Harry Dean Stanton (and Buddha before him)."

@pratibha

Mar 7, 2024

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interesting academic writing

i studied sociology and the wonderful v interdisciplinary field of gender studies, here is a combo of my favorite papers + some of the most interesting (if not bizarre) ones. obv they are both heavy fields and i don’t remember exactly what is in each so just be warned there may be difficult topics mentioned! also i am just copy/pasting some of these from old bibliographies and syllabi lol but if you google them most have free PDFs online. i tried picking stuff related to culture but apologies if this is too long, i am a soc/gs nerd! articles: the REAL meaning and origin of the term “male gaze” (and why I get SO mad when women today misuse it instead of saying internalized misogyny): Laura Mulvey “Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema” 1989 Dana M Britton “The Epistemology of the Gendered Organization” 2000 Dick Hebdidge “Subculture: The Meaning of Style” 2011 (book) George Chauncey “Gay New York: Gender, Urban Culture, and the Making of the Gay Male World, 1890–1940” 1994 (book not article but super iconic / important) Dean Spade “Normal Life: Administrative Violence, Critical Trans Politics and the Limits of Law” 2011 (another book, v dense) Joan Acker (def check out her other work if you like this one, I love her stuff) “From Sex Roles to Gendered Institutions” 1992 Colin Kaepernick, Robin D. G. Kelley, and Keeanga-Yamahtta Taylor (editors) ”Our History Has Always Been Contraband” 2023 (book about Black Studies comprised of essays/excerpts of theory and about history) Evan B Towle and Lynn M Morgan “Romancing the Transgender Native Rethinking the Use of the "Third Gender" Concept” 2002 WEB DuBois “The Souls of Black Folk” 1903 (more people should read this) J. E. Sumerau, Ryan T. Cragun, Lain A. B. Mathers ““I Found God in The Glory Hole”: The Moral Career of a Gay Christian” 2016 lol Patricia Hill Collins “TOWARD A NEW VISION: RACE, CLASS, AND GENDER AS CATEGORIES OF ANALYSIS AND CONNECTION” 1993 (sorry for all caps) Candace West and Don H. Zimmerman “Doing Gender” 1987 Laurel Westbrook and Kristen Schilt “Doing Gender, Determining Gender: Transgender People, Gender Panics, and the Maintenance of the Sex/Gender/Sexuality System” 2014 (MORE PEOPLE SHOULD READ THIS! it basically offers empirical evidence / explanation of of how transphobia actually perpetuates misogyny rather than simply “protecting women” or not) Olúfemi O. Táíwò “Elite Capture: How the Powerful Took Over Identity Politics“ 2022 (book) Cathy J Cohen “Punks, Bulldaggers, and Welfare Queens” 1997 Colin P Ashley “Gay Liberation: How a Once Radical Movement Got Married and Settled Down” 2015

@marxinista

Oct 15, 2024

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The Coquette on beauty privilege (2014)– "That’s the insidious subtlety of social control."

"Beauty privilege is very real. None of us are imagining it, and if we aren’t born genetic lottery winners, our only option is to compensate with style, grace, and charm. Of course, none of that shit comes cheap. That’s kind of the whole point. It’s all meant to be aspirational and exclusionary. We’re supposed to feel depressed by our skin, agitated by our bodies, and anxious about our invisibility. That’s the insidious subtlety of social control. The worst part is that we know in our rational minds that it’s all bullshit, and yet we’re still plagued with self-loathing when we can’t live up to unattainable beauty standards. No matter how much self-acceptance we achieve, we can still look in the mirror and instantly catalog all the things about ourselves that we don’t think measure up. It’s maddening. It makes us feel like hypocrites even though it’s not our hypocrisy." – The Coquette, Ugly-Sexy: Cool? | Adult Mag (2014)

@aubergine

Oct 2, 2024

Top Recs from @killer

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set your reading goal this year

I feel like 12 is a wonderful place to start. 1 book a month. Keep it in your bathroom. Beside your bed. Where you eat your meals. Please read this year. It's one of the best things you can do for yourself. and for me, and for everyone who you'll tell, I'm reading again, and you should read with me too. Take pictures or screencaps of passages and send them to your friends. Read funny, easy books, evil and upsetting books, books that are boring but are still satisfying to finish. Go to the library. Challenge yourself. You will feel better, you'll feel proud of yourself, and you'll banish the negative moodlet of being mad or ashamed at yourself for not reading. It's ok that you haven't been. You had your reasons and it doesn't do any good to beat up on yourself. That was then and this was now. Start a book tomorrow bc it is a new day :)

@killer

Jan 1, 2025

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set yourself against algorithmic recommendation

I don't listen to any AI generated playlists because I prefer to hear ones curated by people. I love sharing music as a human to human thing. It's also dismaying how music streaming services prioritize the songs of artists whose management pay them, etc. It's so fun to simply browse anonymous person's curated lists instead on top of sharing with friends. It's never been easier to peek into someone else's semi-private music preference and walk their landscape. Just today I found a person who's made dozens of playlists for specific beanie babies (!), all with no saves or likes. We don't need AI driven sorting to develop taste and find things we like. Break out of the corral with me and run free. Let's see what's over the hill

@killer

Aug 6, 2024

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Cultivating RECIPROCAL relationships

be giving, accept graciously, be thankful, withdraw when it's wise

@killer

Jul 20, 2024