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Recently I started rock climbing. I was extremely trepidatious at the start. The only experience I had with climbing of any kind were those portable and ticket-able rock walls that would pop up on the boardwalks of NJ in the height of the summer tourist rush. The first couple of visits, I could barely get on the wall. My toes would slip, my fingers would release. Even when I was able to hold myself up, I was terrified of falling, of equipment failing me, of making a fool of myself in a crowded gym full of people who looked like they had been born doing this.
I’m still very new, I’m still learning. But every time I walk into the building, my silly little shoes in chalky hand, I decide that I’m going to do something hard. Because I can do hard things, and so can you.
I can make it to the top of the wall now. Not every time, and certainly not on every course. But sometime soon I will. Because I keep trying something hard.
Jan 29, 2025
Related Recs
I began leading ice two days ago. I chose a WI3 called Arethusa Falls, the tallest waterfall in New Hampshire. It was somewhat of a trial by fire, but i held it together through the most dangerous moments of my life. there is hardly any room for error on the sharp end on ice. you simply cannot fall or else you risk a 33% of a life altering injury or even worse. You mustn’t start up that frozen wall unless you have full confidence to finish the endeavor. When I pulled through the last bulge and topped out Arethusa, I saw god at the top and punched him in the jaw. the sun shone upon me and granted me its warmth after a bitter cold fight. I turned around to look at the beauty of the valley behind me and I let out a howl. I am an ice climber. I am fearless and in control.
Feb 7, 2024
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I’m awful at doing things I’m not immediately good at. But doing the full band tour for my record is forcing me to learn how to play guitar while reciting spoken word poetry. It’s so hard, and I never would have stuck at it if I didn’t basically have to. But it feels SO rewarding now I’ve nearly got it, and it’s gonna be such a great brag once I’ve got it nailed. Challenge yourself! Become good at things you are bad at! I think my next challenge will be chess, because how the fuck do people even do that?
Apr 6, 2024
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alt title: spontaneity
other folks have already sung the praises of learning to appreciate the mundane, and they're right but there are probably some obvious ways you can circumvent mundanity in your day to day – you know you better than anyone; what does your heart yearn for? what do you wish was a more active part of your life?
then just fucken go out there and do it. do it in the scariest way possible. lower the barriers you've constructed around yourself to keep you safe and comfortable, because those things are what define mundanity. reduce the friction to do medium-challenging or medium-scary stuff by doing big scary stuff. then do it again. and again, and again
it's going to be exhausting, there are going to be lulls between the times when you do the big-scary-thing that opens doors, but the more you do it the easier it gets and the more momentum builds from initial pushes
november 2023 i was taking djing lessons, and i had made some progress but had never dreamed of actually playing for people (or at least not like, any time soon.) after a lesson i saw an instagram post about an open decks that very night. i forced myself to go – and absolutely fucked up my ~15 minute set. but a year later, i was invited by one of the hosts to play another open decks. then a month later, my friend asked me to dj vinyl for her birthday. two weeks later i got booked for a party, and a week after that i got asked to play another party where they recorded my set and put it on socials
show up to a pottery studio and ask them about their course offerings, go to an open mic and perform something you've been sitting on (or just pull something out of your ass), just step off the ledge and lo and behold, you'll be in the water
Feb 1, 2025
Top Recs from @hardheaded_heavyhearted
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Dared myself to go to the dentist…
and I went. Turns out it’s never worse than the fear we surround it with 🤷
Feb 10, 2025
Not from a place of dreading the day but from a position of gratitude and warmth. The love and comfort felt can carry on with you throughout your day, just invite it along for the ride.
Feb 5, 2025
whispers of Midwest emo with a dash of math rock? This album took me on a drive past melancholy into the fields of nostalgia… the soundtrack to a conversation with a past self.
Jan 29, 2025