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I made a lot of doable New Years Resolutions at the turn of this year. Last year sucked, and I was so so soooo determined to get out of that funk. i spent the first three weeks dieting, keeping the apartment clean, saving money/paying off debt, and all that good stuff⊠and then all hell broke loose in every section of my life. All of it was completely out of my control! Death of a friend/coworker that left me spiraling, car problems, more surprise debt, all the worst things possible. life just absolutely took a harsh left turn and it left me feeling completely hopeless that this year could be a good one if this is how the first month was going. I spent the last two weeks in a pity party for one, thinking to myself âwhy even try to do better in life?â I started eating junk food again, stopped caring for myself, and essentially allowing myself to slip through the cracks I so carefully began mending just a month prior. Mourning is such a tough thing to go through, and this was the first death of someone whom I interact with on an almost daily basis. i was not okay. i still am not doing good. BUT I realized today that, unfortunately, the only way out is THROUGH. I stopped wondering how am I supposed to get through this pain, and remembered that that is exactly what I am doing. Iâm getting through the tough parts of life by existing. There is no quick fix to pain and loss, you must push through, even if your knees get scraped up on the way out. Iâve decided I must pick myself up, dust myself off, and do my absolute fucking best I can this year, regardless of what life puts me through, because I deserve it.
So, my first recommendation on this website is to push through this year. take it easy, but donât let yourself fall through the cracks. You deserve a better life than what youâve given yourself so far. Try your best to improve on something every day and hopefully there will be a big pay off in the future youâll be so happy you worked for.
Feb 11, 2025
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âRather than letting our negativity get the better of us, we could acknowledge that right now we feel like a piece of shit and not be squeamish about taking a good look.â - Pema Chödrön
Iâve just lived one of the hardest years of my life. There were many days that I cried or felt numb or found myself praying to an interventionist god I do not believe in. In short, things have sucked.
But there are also good days. Days with a lot of laughter with friends, or cuddles from my cats, or some new piece of art that heals me. Itâs not all bad, just as it will never be all good.You have to make peace with this fact because there is no other choice. You donât have to be happy about all of it, but make peace. Experience all that life has to offer and it will transform you.
âThings falling apart is a kind of testing and also a kind of healing. We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things donât really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. Itâs just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.â
Dec 5, 2024
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first of all, Iâm so sorry to hear abt this :( job market is absolutely shit balls insane, and to reach the finish line and be pulled out must feel super heavy.
thatâs the first part. acknowledge the fact that it sucks ass, and validate how you feel. give yourself a day or two of moping, self-pity. it is so valid of you to feel frustrated or discouraged. within the sadness, give yourself grace. make sure you parent yourself with gentle self talk, buy a sweet treat or take some time to talk to loved ones, leave the house, even if you donât feel like it.
Make sure the self pity doesnât lapse into negative paradigms. from my own experience, what I define as âfailureâ will trigger old voices and experiences to come back into the present moment.
understand that no matter what, no matter what the outcome, you are enough. you are on the right path, making all the right choices.
something that helps me move forward, is remembering that life is a giant current of energy. time isnât linear, but we are, to an extent. if you have some ideas of what you want for yourself in the future, that source of energy/ desire must have something at the end of that current.
ie: the person that you are now, is built up of all the versions of you that came before you. you did that! and whoâs to say that your future self right now, isnât beaming down on you in the same way?
I have pretty intense rejection sensitivity. listening, moving, sitting-with & releasing (crying, writing, indulging in bits of joy adjust the sadness) helps to ease into the current, rather than against it.
good luck to you on your soul/job search! this is only one hurdle, there is possibility just up aheadâŠ.
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Jul 24, 2024
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i don't know what happened, but i'm sorry. i think you cope by grieving and mourning. that's what i did. i journaled and cried and howled and screamed and rolled on the floor. i did this for an entire year. and it still wasn't enough. so i reached out to them like 4 days ago lol and it gave me the closure i so desperately needed. please please please remember to be kind to yourself and take care of yourself and show up for yourself even when it's the hardest thing to do. spend time with loved ones. do the things that you love. rediscover your passions. focus on you. treat yourself like the absolute g you are. remember who you are outside of this. it's so easy to lose yourself in this process of grieving. i believe in you. you can get through this <3
Jan 9, 2025
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Apr 16, 2025
Itâs incredible how many people genuinely think they are boring. There have been so many times Iâve spoken with people and they confess that they think that they havenât done much with their life, or that they donât have much interesting to talk about, but itâs almost never the case.
From what I can tell, itâs often caused by a lack of knowing thyself. Or maybe a low self esteem? Iâve been through it too, and it is so so not true for anyone.
Youâve done so much living. Why do you feel like your story is not worth telling? I know youâve gone through some crazy shit once or twice. if you really havenât, whatâs stopping you from getting out there and creating stories to talk about? Start small! go to a coffee shop once a week. See if they have any clubs to join, and try that out! youâll be making memories in NO TIME.
If you have trouble finding meaningful/fun conversation, just remember that the effort must flow both ways. You are merely just working with what the other person is providing you, and if they arenât giving you anything to work with, itâs not your fault. You arenât boring, you are just around people who dont vibe with you. And thatâs okay! Not every person is going to be your specific kind of person. Plus, if you arenât having fun talking to them, why does it matter if they like you? the much cooler people who value your input are just around the corner. I promise.
One day youâll be able to shine your beautiful personality on someone who is equally as bright you are, you magnificent comet, you.
Feb 13, 2025
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no frosting, no filling. nothing beats it.
Apr 10, 2025