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Wouldn’t say I’m desperate, but I’m actively interested in a relationship, trying to move on from a past too complicated and dark to describe on here, but I feel that having that bond with someone and making endlessly fun memories would be a huge benefit, as well as sharing a part of yourself with someone who’s really special and deserving of it.
I know I’m not that bad-looking of a guy, but I haven’t really had much luck on the apps, tried to curtail my profile to be more appearing, whole nine yards. It’s getting to be a bummer.
Should I ditch the app and just let fate take its course?
Feb 16, 2025
Related Recs
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I’ve been feeling pessimistic about dating which is probably really unhelpful. But I’ve given up on the apps (which I think is good for me). But I truly just don’t see people my age around. I’ve got to start creating opportunities to meet the love of my life. Because whatever I’m doing now is Not Working!
As a start, I’m going to try to go to a cafe every friday. Even if I don’t meet the love of my life, it’s still worth trying to get out there.
Mar 10, 2025
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I've Found there’s something so sad about meeting people with the explicit expectation of romance. i feel like I’ve lost the chance to be friends with some really cool people simply because we met on dating apps and tried and failed to date. Good People are everywhere, especially in cities, no need to force the hand of fate.
Apr 12, 2024
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I linked a rec I made over a year ago about deleting hinge and dating the old fashioned way. have I been on a single date since then? nope. do I stand by what I said? absolutely.
I’m still convinced that the apps aren’t perfect, and while they might work for some people they’re kind of a necessary evil at best. without them, it’s hard to put yourself in contexts where meeting someone organically is possible. and even then, within those contexts the meeting has to be just that: organic. it takes time. it takes being in places/situations regularly where you think you’ll meet people who share your interests/values. it also takes a bit of effort to initiate those interactions, and also fate that someone might initiate something with you.
the apps are a convenient, quick fix, instant gratification solution to the issue in that they will get you dates, but in exchange for quantity you may sacrifice on quality. things of quality have no fear of time, though. waiting to encounter someone who is a good fit and in a good phase of life to be what you need and vice versa is going to take time. and if you work a 9-5 like I do, you’re going to have to invest in putting yourself in situations to meet people in your free time.
Mar 11, 2025
Top Recs from @Greenelysium
I don’t understand how yall end up at these random ass places you do, come across the books on ancient polyrhythmic science or whatever you read, listen to those indescribably niche tracks I’ve never heard of before or since, or host art installations from your makeshift garage, but I love hearing about every little bit of it, beyond fascinating to know all your stories and passions and the things that occupy ya mind and keep you alive. It’s like a big canvas comprised of different jagged pieces that all add up to a whole.
I’ve only been on the app for two weeks or so and it’s already partly helped me heal from a lotta past grief and pain so I’m grateful to interact with yall.
Feb 25, 2025
It’s cool to learn new things, it’s cool to develop some new skills. It’s cool to be able to access a whole bunch of data and knowledge at your fingertips.
Don’t let some guy on a podcast become your father figure or give you financial advice or try to anoint you with another monolithic identity not too dissimilar from the one you vowed to leave behind.
Life doesn’t get any better, but YOU do.
Mar 1, 2025
Feb 23, 2025