All I can say is that I know how it feels when you most definitely have not found it: hollow and always wanting for more, looking down the barrel of the rest of your life and wondering if this is what it's always going to be like. I’ve only begun recently within the past year or so to examine all of the ways in which I’ve betrayed my authentic self and the ways I’ve sought dull flat dutiful comfort out of fear of uncertainty and what I’ve lost from that. So I’ll let you know when I get there ;) 💋
Feb 18, 2025

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Sorry but this is genuinely inspirational I feel like my whole life I’ve been looking down that barrel and havent listened to people when they told me to ”follow my passions” - your note on seeking comfort out of uncertainty but still always wanting more is extremely relatable. Hmm much to think about
Feb 19, 2025
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eatgraeps I am SO glad to hear that it resonates with and inspires you!!! It’s been a process within about the last year of just making more and more little choices that feel like they align with my authentic self and coming into my power, my confidence, and my voice. I would have never expected all of the changes that have happened so far and the things I see coming on the horizon! You can always change your life ❤️
Feb 19, 2025
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oh YEAH i feel this entirely. i might not know what it feels like but i def know what it feels like to try to make myself do something or be somewhere that does not make me feel like myself. sending you good vibes while you’re making it happen <3
Feb 18, 2025
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sleeperhit thank you ❤️❤️❤️ I think it’s going to be really good even if it’s scary!!
Feb 18, 2025
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sleeperhit LOVE the everyday matcha by the way
Feb 18, 2025
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taterhole omg ty 😌
Feb 18, 2025
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spent the last five or so years in a maze of ennui and self-pity, but i have in the last 18 months slowly been clawing my way towards something resembling the life i want to be living. i can see the end of the tunnel now, but strangely that amplifies my impatience. when things seemed more hopeless it was perversely sort of freeing - i didn’t know where i should be going, so i wasn’t in a rush. now that i have the full map in my hands i have nothing left to do but drive towards the end. that’s exactly what i wanted, in a sense, but now i have the burden of actually executing on the promises i made to myself - turns out that’s harder than making the promises in the first place! who knew
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To be upfront, there are two things about myself that I love: 1. I'm tenacious AF 2. I am generally a positive person. I can handle almost any situtation, and I've had to learn to actually ask/demand more, so it's not always great. With that being said, I've wanted to die many times. I've experienced a lot of trauma. I have PTSD for years. Things got to a point where I knew if I didn't make really drastic changes I was going to die in some way- I simply could not go on how I was. The only thing that started to change things is when I started to learn more about myself and my reasons for doing things, being with certain people, getting into certain relationships. Part of my whole issue was that I had major trauma from childhood that I was actively avoiding. So many things happen to us as children, big and small, that we don't have the capacticy to deal with at the time. But as adults, we do. I remember the moment where things started shifting for me. It unlocked a hunger in me to dig more and more to why I was the way I was, and why I made the choices I did, in a really deep way. I became more action oriented in facing my shit, healing it, and discovering what I was like without it. It definitely wasn't easy, and it wasn't fun most of the time, but in reality the years I spent doing that are small compared to the life I have ahead of me. I'm a whole new person, but the parts of me that are true are the same. I became a more mature, loving, responsible version of myself. Hating your life is a sign something is not working. If you're unsure what that is, go inward. If you don't know where to start, think about the very next step. That's all you need to do. You're never locked in where you're at now forever. Don't know what you want to do for a career? Switch gears and do a completely different job. There is no timeline. You can literally do whatever you want. When I was doing a lot of the stressful inner work, I worked at animal shelters because I needed something so low stress. And I was mid 20's!!! No career goals in sight!!! Not even anywhere in my brain!!! If you're straight up hating something that is taking up most of your time... just quit it. Life is too short. Success to me is ease and grace. I want a peaceful, joyful life (most of the time). Sometimes to figure out what you need to do, you gotta take a giant step back. Or a step to the left. Or take a big roundabout. Or maybe a quest needs to be taken...
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Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ✅💅
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