my love and I parted ways a few months ago after our 5th anniversary. has truly been the hardest period of my entire life to slowly pick up the pieces and move on, a process that is nowhere near over even as much as I want it to be.
my biggest piece of advice is to surrender to the pain. don’t let yourself be drawn into anger and hatred, just let the crumbling happen. let the tears flow! talk to your friends about it over and over again. sit in silence with the people you love. fall asleep on the couch once in a while.
don’t bother with “why” — it’s a useless question, trust me.
Feb 20, 2025
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i don't know what happened, but i'm sorry. i think you cope by grieving and mourning. that's what i did. i journaled and cried and howled and screamed and rolled on the floor. i did this for an entire year. and it still wasn't enough. so i reached out to them like 4 days ago lol and it gave me the closure i so desperately needed. please please please remember to be kind to yourself and take care of yourself and show up for yourself even when it's the hardest thing to do. spend time with loved ones. do the things that you love. rediscover your passions. focus on you. treat yourself like the absolute g you are. remember who you are outside of this. it's so easy to lose yourself in this process of grieving. i believe in you. you can get through this <3
Jan 9, 2025
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I like to remember that time is on your side, it will get easier as time goes by just for nature of it. So focusing on going through the day-to-day the best you can while being kind to yourself and letting the days past is what helped me.
It’s not easy, you have to go through the grief to come up on the other side.
But stick with the things that make your present more bearable and you WILL come up on the other side.
For me it was doing things for myself: listening to music, visiting close friends, cooking for myself, going on walks on nature, spending time alone and bored and finding new things I liked and enjoying my own company was life changing.
The loneliness is rough but it can be a great teacher (at least I like to think something had to come out of all that pain).
I guess it really depends on the break up the narratives you are telling yourself right now, but if you can be mindful about them, observe them, and let go of trying to understand and control everything they get less cruel. Right now you just need to survive and receive some kindness, later on you can build the story around it (Without the fog of the pain around it).
And for the love of god cut contact with them, their family and friends, at least for a while. rebuild yourself outside their zone of influence. Show vulnerability if you can, it can bring great support and lending ears, BE KIND TO YOURSELF (although have in mind sometimes over indulgence is not kind).
You will get through it, time is on your side.
Apr 18, 2024
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As someone who is maybe 2ish connections removed from the situation Im assuming you may be referring to… I am so deeply sorry 💔 hope you know that there are many strangers out there who are rooting for you and think you deserve to be happy and treated well, despite being strangers …
As someone who has been through a lot of heartbreak, the advice already given in previous comments is really great . I think in my experience, having 1 or 2 friends that you know really love you and get you, that you can spend time with even if you are really sad and not contributing much, was helpful. If you feel the need to talk about your feelings try to keep it to those people, or a journal. Once you start to feel a little better going out with more people and being more social can really help remind you of what is valuable about YOU.. what YOU enjoy and bring to the world..
Above all it helped me to remind myself that life is going to go on. You will move on, no matter how long it might take. It might feel like the worst thing in the world but i promise you will get through it. It’s just a matter of time :) be kind to yourself while time passes. I cant emphasize enough how deeply I have felt so heartbroken I thought I couldnt go on. Multiple times. Yet here I am.. and you will be okay too ❤️
Mar 3, 2024
Top Recs from @its_just_kate
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at least casually. don’t delete the accounts but don’t have the apps on your phone either.
rediscover your love of reading thru the magic of recognizing titles strangers are holding on the subway. become a subway reader.
don’t use sound as an escape from your thoughts/feelings/surroundings. grocery shopping without headphones is actually kind of beautiful!
pick up a new hobby or two or three. one of them should be something you’re not good at, and at least one should be no- or low-cost.
never. stop. learning. the library, the parks and rec department, and nearby museums offer great materials already but also usually have free lectures or courses.
go outside more. like, a lot more.
(took this much less literally, so apologies if it’s not what you’re looking for lol — as a narcoleptic I have no tips on how to Not Sleep since Sleep is basically my job)
Sep 30, 2024
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destined in the stars
Jan 1, 2025
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keeps it funky, keeps it fresh! a book for outside, a book for downstairs, a book for bed, a book for the subway, a book for the bathtub…..
Nov 30, 2024