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Fuck tracking calories. I do not give a fuck about macros or myfitnesspal.
I go to the gym to get sweaty, a juicy pump, and to chat with strong men gorgeous women.
Last night after the gym I went to McDonaldâs and got two chicken snack wraps and a 10piece nugget meal. FUCK IT.
Feb 27, 2025
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I got into weight lifting for the same reason I get into most things, which is pure unbridled vanity. I read or heard somewhere in my many biohacker information channels that weight lifting is the most anti-aging form of exercise, especially for women, and so I was like on my way! I wasnât about to pay some community college bro $100 an hour at my LA Fitness to train me though so I just googled âweight lifting classes near meâ and because I live a charmed and bless life I found the fucking coolest independent gym like a mile from my house and have been going there for almost a year. Vanity aside, it just makes you feel so good all the time. I love watching myself get stronger and I love the feeling after you lift something really heavy you thought you could never have lifted and I love all the neighborhood friends Iâve made there, including former PI subject and possibly coolest girl alive Petra Cortright. (Honestly a large part of my social life takes place there?) Anyway everyone over 30 should lift weights, preserve your waning muscle mass and build up your self-esteem babe.
Oct 20, 2023
Listen, if youâre just starting to lift weights and need something to get the juices flowinâ, be my guest and listen to some corny ass rock music. Couldnât be me! But be my guest. I want people to feel comfortable in their bodies, so as long as you feel as if have more agency than before, good.
HOWEVER. Any experienced lifter knows you can only reach that upper echelon of workouts if you feel hot. Not like, âOh Iâm starting to see some progress good for me.â No, fuck that. Iâm talkinâ HOT. You gotta feel SEXY. Step your game up by ditching the chugging guitars and put on some snap. If you are not walking onto the gym floor like you are on stage at Magic City in Atlanta circa 2008 than take your ass back to the couch.
Feb 9, 2024
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Some of the best people watching. There were like 5 15-year-olds just eating McDonaldâs in the weight room yesterday
Jan 16, 2024
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Apr 10, 2025
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i Am a proud fan of weird women!!!
Newest weird woman acquisition: the cute shy girl from my MBA program with a curly bob and red highlights.
Shes so quiet and shy, weâve had every class together so far over 3 semesters and barely ever spoke aside from her saying happy Valentineâs Day to me in February. Fast forward to this semester I sit next to her first day of finance class and decide to Be friendly and chat. Sheâs quiet but cool so I get her number, offer to maybe study later in the semester (which is a mild courtesy as I was lowkey just gaining new allies in the class to assist with cheating).
But once I started texting her about class we just never stopped texting, and now I think weâre actively flirting? Shes into dark romance novels? she brought one of her novels to class yesterday and after class she snuggled up against me in the hallway and made me read a (very graphic) page about a girl getting fucked by a gun? This chick is nuts. Am I catching feelings?
Sep 17, 2024
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*only do this when you MUST get FLY and exude unspeakable and ineffable confidence where ppl will probably call you a cocky asshole*
recite this prayer:
Dear Haters,
You can all suck my balls from the back and my dick from the front.
I was born to be great.
you were all born to debate my greatness.
Clearly we are not the same.
in times of uncertainty I stand tall.
Even when alone, my spirit is guided by Godâs invisible hand who shields me from the bullshit.
A back this broad was earned by climbing to places most could never reach.
If theyve never seen these heights, how could they comprehend my perspective?
Anyone with something negative to say is miles beneath me with mushy shit in their pamper and piss dribbling down their soft, weak legs.
Thank you mint god for humility.
Thank you mint god for strength.
Love,
(Your name)
And although I may not appear in the physical form, you will feel an aura of mint purple surrounding you and a genuine earthy sense of pride in your chest to continue on your mission, no fucks given.
Jun 19, 2024