Dropped out of college. Twice. (I was bored at 19 & bored at 23)
Was scouted to be a model by the man/company who formed & funded BSB & NSYNC. Thank God my folks said no.
Went to massage therapy school. Didnāt do a thing with it.
Planted 1500 trees last spring during my internship with a local nonprofit. Wore big boots, drove a big truck, sometimes in the rain & mud, sometimes in 100 degree heat.
I could go on, but Iāve shared enough lol
Mar 10, 2025
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First when I was about four I wanted to be a standup comedian, then I wanted to work with Greenpeace, then I wanted to be a novelist, then I wanted to be a Broadway star but I have literally no ability to dance, then I wanted to be a clinical psychologist.
by high school my grades were tanking because I was skipping school a lot and not turning in any work and I saw Cirque du Soleil Quidam and wanted to move to Montreal and be a circus clown despite having no athletic skill.
Then I wanted to be a hand model which is what I would tell my school guidance counselors when they would angrily ask what I was going to do with my life. Would have said a regular model but Iām short so I wanted to be realistic but now I am a hair model (not as a career) so thatās fun. I think Iāve made out pretty well for myself for a girl with no directionā¦
Apr 24, 2024
But I am kind of a goober with the most boring job on the planet just objectively speaking (luckily it gives me freedom to do other fun things in my spare time like writing and making stuff like a podcast and now YouTube gameplay videos).
You can see a recommended post below this one entitled Well to read about my prior career aspirations. Teen me would probably be disappointed but itās okay.
I finally own a dog like I wanted. I have clear skin, boobs, and the ability to talk to people now which I never thought would happen. i live somewhere green and rainy instead of the sunny desert!
I did also get to fulfill my attention-seeking childhood dream of being on TV because Iām a hair model for a local salon owner and we did a spot on the morning news (lol). I have very nice hair in general all the time for this same reason which was something I always dreamed of as a reckless serial DIY hair cutter/colorer.
Editing to add that I also wanted to die tragically young of tuberculosis and fall in love in the sanatorium. or to be like Emily Dickinson and live by myself next to a cemetery writing to myself but feared having my imaginary future writing shared posthumously without my consent like Kafka. But look at me now I canāt stop posting so I think I failed at the whole mysterious hermit thing (though I am relatively solitary)
Oct 18, 2024
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I had a strict self-imposed morning routine starting in elementary school where I would set an alarm to wake up at 5:00 am, get up and go to the backyard where I would do circuits alternating between running laps, jumping rope, jumping jacks, push-ups, and crunches. Then I would sit and watch Pappyland, Golden Girls, and knitting shows until my dad made me breakfast and I would try to get to school very early just so that I could be there before other people were.
I wanted to be a standup comedian when I was four, then a news broadcaster, then an author, to name a few. I wrote a novella in fifth grade and shared it with everyone I could. I loved agility training my dog Holly. I was a voracious reader and checked out every book out in my school library to the point my school librarian started bringing me her own books from home that she thought I would be interested in.
I had approximately one million Barbie dolls and their associated accessories and I liked to make outfits for them and have them act out news broadcasts and murder mysteries. I would take roly polies from the dirt or crickets from the pet store and build habitats for them. I liked gardening with my dad, pulling weeds, propagating cuttings, and planting seeds. I loved going to the zoo and watching movies on TCM with my mom!
My dad is an artist and taught me the fundamentals of art and to use all kinds of different mediums, but my favorite was oil pastel. I enjoyed doing still lives the most. I liked to rearrange and decorate my bedroomāonce I made a closet breakfast nook that I was really excited about; I called it Dorotheaās Cafe after my late grandmother and decorated it with her embroideries. I loved Nancy Drew games and other computer games. At night I would take bubble baths in the dark and play whale sounds in my Barbie car that had a built in CD player.
As I got older, I was in youth symphony orchestra (I played viola which is so me), choir, school musicals (wanted to be a Broadway star until I realized I couldnāt dance but also I kept getting cast as a boy), math club, and speech competitions (poetry readings and dramatic readings were my favorite). I liked to write original fiction and comics for my weird goth/emo/scene anime nerd friends to read. I did get into anime and manga at this time and I loved reading nonfiction to learn about as many things as I could.
In high school I gradually retreated into my shell after a series of traumatic experiences, one of which Iām writing about now, until basically I stopped doing all extracurriculars except for Japanese Club (lol). I just really loved my Japanese language teacher and wanted to spend more time with her :-) by that time I would just read classic tones and furiously scribble poetry and drawings by myself. I also liked to collage and do photography and I unfortunately became a Tumblr user. Thatās about itā¦
Oct 18, 2024
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Mar 19, 2025
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so you can hear the mail lady crash out on a speakerphone call. āYou dumb motherfucker, thatās NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT!!!ā Pulled off the mail truck mad as hell too.
Anti-rec: driving angry
Apr 15, 2025
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My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friendsā
It gives a lovely light!
Feb 11, 2025