I used to be incredibly shy, like no one could hear me talk. But then COVID happened, so my junior year of hs was hybrid so i had a super small AP Chem class and got more comfortable with them, and then it was senior year. And I realized in senior year that wait a minute, I’m not going to see any of these people ever again, so I just said fuck it we ball and decided it’s ok to be weird LOL and yapped waaaaayyyy to much… now I’m in college and I kinda forgot about like that I have to see these people for another few years but I don’t really care anymore LOL. Now I talk a lot in class because I get annoyed that people won’t answer questions and I want to move onto the next thing.
I do also have anxiety, and I still very much have trouble with it but I feel like it’s in different ways now??? Like sometimes it’s socially but I am also forgetful and get distracted easily so I try not to dwell on it and distract myself with something new instead
Apr 27, 2025
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that was my senior year of college in the middle of covid, so 90% of it was spent inside doing homework and smoking weed with my bestie. which is like a pretty good way to spend a year under other circumstances but my anxiety was going so crazy and I was mostly bummed out a lot about all the in-person senior stuff I was missing out on.
Jun 11, 2024
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i was far too busy getting completely obliterated to do so in my early 20s. (do not recommend.)
but the experience of doing schoolwork now feels like it did as a little kid. you know.. before puberty knocked me awake to the reality of my shitty home life, which caused a haze of depression to fall over me.
in my single digit years i remember being so excited to do school work, and feeling so proud of myself when i did well. im getting a taste of that again.
i never lost the exhilarating feeling i got from gaining knowledge that truly excites me. but it’s a beautiful new kinda thing with the added clarity gained from not being ripped on weed 24/7 and the added confidence gained from surviving the shit hand that was given to me as a kid.
hang in there 🕊️
Oct 28, 2024
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ive met a few people been to some parties and been involved in drama within the past nine-ish months i’ve been in college and these are my thoughts:
- (when it comes to people my age) everyone is the same as how they were in high school. no one’s really grown or mature, it’s just high school part two with less restrictions.
- alcohol isn’t really that cool anymore, i never liked drinking and im liking it less and less. Who i’m looking for at parties are the queers in the smoke circle….
- people who you think are cool are much more socially awkward and insecure than you think (and probably more than you!)
- you will get more queer due to abundance of exposure as compared to your red state hometown
Overall college is pretty chill and thank god for graduating high school
Apr 13, 2025
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Proud of it hehehe
Lowkey very stressed about school rn but she’s baller so idk that’s nice and I’m proud of myself. I especially like the tail :)
Apr 14, 2025
Finals for my digital painting class! Have never done it before this class and like it’s crazy how much I’ve learnt but yeah I stayed up till like 3 making this hope yall like it :333
Apr 25, 2025
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THE FLOWERS OUTSIDE MY HOUSE ARE STARTING TO GROW!!! THEYRE PINK AND BEAUTIFUL AND ALMOST READY TO BLOOM
Apr 16, 2025