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zooming out my perspective helps me do this. humans working has been essential to our survival and development as a species since weāve been here. even if when weāre clocked in weāre just cogs in the machine, that machine can be necessary. finding the reasons you do what you do, the people whoās lives you help or make easier by doing your job, the way your job impacts your communityā¦ i feel all this helps encourage pride and purpose in whatever weāre doing.
idk if thatās exactly whatās making you sad, but i get it. the idea of a life of work ahead sounds daunting and miserable, but humans are adaptable and i hope you find some more joy in your job soon!
idk if thatās exactly whatās making you sad, but i get it. the idea of a life of work ahead sounds daunting and miserable, but humans are adaptable and i hope you find some more joy in your job soon!
May 8, 2025
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š(I'm an old(ish). Thanks for considering this advice, given earnestly and with good intention, from experience.)
Assuming the nature of your work isn't the source of the sadness? The gratitude you mentioned... Find ways to blow that up! Reflect on whether a past version of yourself would be proud of where you are now. The peace of boredom is a blessing. Seriously! A large amount of time spent as an adult is simply existing day-to-day. It gets repetitive, "there's nothing new under the sun."
But also, stay as healthy as possible so you can do things outside of work. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well. Don't smoke or vape anything. Maybe when the rhythm of your career settles in you will be able fully build out your whole life and work will only be a little part of it. The transition from school to career is temporary, trust that you'll get the balance right soon enough. IDK... I wouldn't know about long term careers, š I have done a bunch of different stuff since I finished with school, none of it even close to what I went for. If I got bored or outgrew it or it got toxic, I moved on. No one *wants* to labor, right? Capitalism š¤¬ sucks. But we *do* want to contribute to society, to our communities. Many types of work do that even under capitalism. So. Whatever you do, be grateful that you are contributing, but realize it doesn't define you, and learn how to be grateful for things that you might otherwise not be, like boredom.
Gratitude is always the answer, especially to sadness; and comparison is a thief of joy.
But also, stay as healthy as possible so you can do things outside of work. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well. Don't smoke or vape anything. Maybe when the rhythm of your career settles in you will be able fully build out your whole life and work will only be a little part of it. The transition from school to career is temporary, trust that you'll get the balance right soon enough. IDK... I wouldn't know about long term careers, š I have done a bunch of different stuff since I finished with school, none of it even close to what I went for. If I got bored or outgrew it or it got toxic, I moved on. No one *wants* to labor, right? Capitalism š¤¬ sucks. But we *do* want to contribute to society, to our communities. Many types of work do that even under capitalism. So. Whatever you do, be grateful that you are contributing, but realize it doesn't define you, and learn how to be grateful for things that you might otherwise not be, like boredom.
Gratitude is always the answer, especially to sadness; and comparison is a thief of joy.
May 8, 2025
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ā¤ļøHad a moment last night where I was stacking menus at work and staring out the window and kind of asked myself, ādo I really need to stay here?ā. Idk, money is important, but I think Iād rather work somewhere that lets my personality shine rather than makes me feel unappreciated and devalued. Makes me feel kinda bad that I decided this is normal instead of sticking up for myself. ~~~not sure what to do ~~~~ :/
Mar 23, 2024
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šThis will be a long one, sorry in advance. Coincidentally, I was recently going through all of my bookshelves to sort what Iām keeping and what Iām giving away. I found some older journals of mine; Iām historically very bad at keeping journals but I always try and usually manage a few to even several months of some years. Looking back at them was bittersweet because I was in the same boat, severely depressed most years and wondering what the point of anything was. But at the same time, I got to see things like old bucket lists I made myself and all of the things Iāve checked off. It was an interesting moment of considering what my younger self would be thinking of me and what Iāve done in the years since whichever year it each book was from.
While I wouldnāt say time makes everything better, I will say that when you just keep pushing through eventually there comes a point where youāre more at peace than ever and you donāt even realize it at first. I donāt think thereās one universal āMeaning of life,ā but I do think the human experience is so complex and we have to teach ourselves to give our self some grace.Ā Ā
A few years ago I was at an all time high for stress, I have an autoimmune disease and the flare ups were only worsened by the stress, anxiety, and depression I was feeling, I felt burnt out and like I had put my whole life on hold for other people. Iāve since learned that while it sounds funny on the internet, free will is a beautiful thing. Choosing where and with who you spend your energy, doing things just for the love of doing them, traveling even if itās by yourself, taking yourself out to dinner or cooking for one. Iāve learned that thereās no point feeling embarrassment or anxiety about doing things by myself because really no one is paying that much attention or judging in the first place, but I also tell myself things like āyouāll never see these people again anyway, who cares,ā lol. A big one for me personally was learning boundaries and gray rockingā donāt let other peopleās emotions, moods, and manipulative behaviors dictate the way youāre feeling. But all of these little, seemingly inconsequential in the grand scheme of things (especially when youāre depressed), things that I was teaching myself along the way really helped me learn to start living for myself rather than for other people or any huge existential purpose.Ā
So, while your question was āwhatās the meaning lifeā and I donāt think anyone has a concrete answer, my unsolicited advice is that you have to keep learning yourself. How do you want to spend your time? What things spark joy for you? What things make you feel worse? Try new foods and experience new places, learn, go to museums. Pick up a new hobby. Go out in nature more, sometimes sitting in the sunshine really does wonders.
Alright, Iāll stop my little tangent now, but wishing the bestš«¶š»
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first project iāve actually finished in YEARS!! it took me way too long (it was supposed to be a christmas present whoops) but here is the goddamn duck i told myself i would put on this jacket. itās HERE and I put it there!!! with my own hands!!!
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my chameleon died this morning and i buried him in my momās backyard. i had a lot of ladders in his cage, he seemed to really like to zip around on em. it was hard to see him lose mobility in his old age, but i like to remember him as a climber.
rest in peace mr. princess