🧖‍♀️
I valued the idea of being low maintenance and chill for so long and I don't know if it's been living in LA and or being around more rich people but I realized recently that it is all a lie. every single person that is effortlessly “just being themselves” is lying. They are getting acupuncture and lymphatic drainage and taking pilates and yoga 3 times a week and getting facials and layering $90 serums and creams on top of their face and going to erewhon 80 times a day to get probiotic water that does not exist. they are a project. and guess what? so am I! sometimes it's nice.
Jun 19, 2023
Related Recs
🧼
Maybe it’s just my frontal lobe developing but I’ve been really simplifying the aesthetics of my life lately… no more dyed hair or heavy makeup… pared back outfits, plain nails and switching auto-caps back on…. Investing in the quality and durability of things/people in my life rather than the folly of aesthetic currency.
Theres something awesome about feeling like I’m enough as a person on the inside without trying so hard to reflect it on the outside. I don’t have to be the most interesting person in a room anymore! I can just be :)
Dec 9, 2024
📸
I realized a few years ago that my desire and attempts to look a certain way were failing. It wasn’t realistic, and it was making me feel inauthentic, empty, and unhappy. Cameras capture every thing, so it’s easy to dwell on imperfections. But that’s not how people experience you. It’s not how others think about you or see you. Imagine how critical you are of yourself and imagine someone else being that critical of another person. You’d think there’s something wrong with them! Who focuses on a person’s looks that much! Get a life you misery!
That’s how we treat ourselves. There’s an epidemic happening where everyone wants and is going out and getting the same face. The same body. It’s so boring. Your “flaws”—as society has taught you to think about them—are not flaws. They make you unique. Memorable. They make you beautiful. To love yourself is active resistance in an economy fueled by obsession over flaws and unhappiness.
One of the actors in White Lotus, Aimee Lou Woods has some objectively flawed teeth. But that’s what makes her so unique, so special. So cute! They make her attractive because she’s unapologetic about them.
Embracing my big goofy smile and big ears and crinkled crows feet makes me feel comfortable in my own skin. That feeling is so powerful. It spreads to other parts of your life and attracts people to you. It’s how you carry yourself, how you move in the world, engage with other people— not how you look.
Mar 29, 2025
đź«€
I've recently realized that, despite my consistent efforts to be authentic, I've still been structuring a lot of my goals and presentation based on what other people will think of me. It's all rooted in impressing others, because I worry that people won't like me if I don't impress them. It's not something I've been doing consciously, though. I think it is deeply ingrained with so many people my age because we grew up with social media. At 23, I'm only just beginning to understand how this may have really warped my brain. Additionally, I think a lot of family structures and the school system function this way. There is so much pressure to be "successful" in society. I have always supported the idea of other people expressing themselves without having to worry about being "cringe" or embarrassing, but I haven't been living it myself. I would love to strip back all the layers of expectations that have been painted onto me until I find who is really underneath again.
Dec 27, 2024
Top Recs from @ayo
🤼
so nice finishing something or having a friend finish something and then swapping that book. sharing things with your loved ones? making memories tactile? it's nice! (some that I've given or received that I've loved as of late: why fish don't exist - lulu miller, clarice lispector - an apprenticeship, how to do nothing - jenny odell, stay true - hua hsu)
Jun 19, 2023
🎬
The world's tough place. There's lots of movies I want to see and because of the dumbest corporate reasons, lots of times they're unavailable or only available to buy on a streaming service. At that point I'd rather just get a blu-ray (s/o walmart dot com and the kino lorber sale...) but if I can't find one, or if it's $50, I'll straight up just see if it's avail to watch on youtube or through the internet archive and a lot of times it is. The quality might not be great, but that's okay. It's important to not get what you want sometimes in life. (Elaine May's A New Leaf, Scorsese's Kundun, Todd Solondz' Happiness, Akira Kuroswa's Dreams, Joseph L. Mankiewicz's Sleuth etc. etc.)
Jun 19, 2023
🍊
Travel is weird on the body. I'm of course, so grateful to be a modern independent woman or whatever but no one talks about how feminism means you're always fighting off a little cold...I really hate swallowing pills so I stand by these swabs when I'm about to get sick. *Ayo's Note: Right before I sent this off, I consulted a friend about my list...turns out the guy who created this was kind of insane and these might not work and might even? damage my nerve receptors xo. That is what is so rock and roll about me....I'm addicted to danger (I'm not).
Jun 19, 2023