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If you’re a young lady and you want gigantic lips, I say go for it, but I also subscribe to the philosophy that you shouldn’t fuck around with your face until after 38 (at which point you should find a good dermatologist who is not afraid to tell you no). All the money you saved on products is going to come in handy here, because doing Morpheus8 or Ultherapy once a year is expensive, but it also keeps you from looking like a shoe that has been left out in the rain. If you still feel like shit, put on a headscarf and pair of sunglasses and everyone will be so dazzled by your mystery that they won’t even look at your skin. And don’t forget to stay the fuck out of the sun!
Feb 28, 2023
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The best $25 I spend every month. Literally pays for itself if you see one movie
plus if I see a bad movie I don’t feel like I wasted money
Jan 30, 2024
I recently watched The Monkey for free at Chicago's Music Box Theatre — and even stuck around for Perkin's Q&A session. I have to say, it was the best movie-going experience I've ever had. An organist played the score with diabolical cymbals in the background — come on! And the movie was hilarious and equal parts gory!
Feb 11, 2025
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Going to the movies rocks. this was honestly such a hard question. This isn’t exactly the ~best~ movie but it is a great movie to see in a theater
From like 19-20 going to the Landmark in Westwood to see the Room with my friends rocked. The Room is such a funny bad movie and it’s even better at this theater because of all the canned responses the audience has to the shit happening on screen. its similar to how campy people get with Rocky Horror Picture Show. People throw plastic spoons and loudly jeer at the movie. occasionally Tommy Wiseau and maybe Greg Sestero will show up and you can take a pic. Highly recommend pregaming and then going with your friends at least once
sometimes a specific audience for it will suck but overall it was always pretty fun.
May 1, 2024
Top Recs from @alissa-bennett
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You have to haul your face around for your entire life, and there’s just no getting around it. As someone who is lurching perilously toward what us old people refer to as “the wrong side of 40,” I am here from your future to tell you not to be afraid, because you can retain your hotness with a little planning! Ever since my very best stage mother and personal BFF Lena Dunham publicly called me out for my elaborate skin care regimen, I’ve been getting questions, so let’s start at the basics and move into the baroque… I don’t think expensive products really make a difference, but if you love them and they make you feel good, by all means waste the money you should be saving for treatments (more on that in a minute) on a 50 step routine—it’s your life! I prefer to streamline because I am old and tired, so while I have definitely tried all of those ritzy oil cleansers and I DO LIKE THEM, in general I think Cetaphil and a microfiber cloth is fine. I usually only wash my face at night and follow it up with some Retin A mixed with a nice heavy moisturizer or oil, and I seal the whole shit in with Aquaphor before going to sleep on a special pillow that doesn’t deform my face. The morning is when things get complicated, because I am a firm believer in all of those gadgets that dermatologists tell you don’t work: I like a red light mask followed by either microcurrent, a muscle stimulation device, or radio frequency, and I follow that up with a CE ferulic serum, hyaluronic acid, moisturizer, and sunscreen. Take your collagen and a vitamin D-K supplement every day, and stay the fuck out of the sun!
Feb 28, 2023
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My true passion is whatever fucked up combination of drugs and alcohol you consumed the last time you woke up and said “never again.” The Instagram account @regret_counter serves as an archive for your bad nights out, and though I am its humble bureaucrat, I am mostly just a fan of your fortitude, your bad choices, and your capacity for White Claw.
Feb 28, 2023
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I love cemeteries, and living in New York gives us proximity to some of the east coast’s great jewels. Deliver your regards and a Coca Cola to spendthrift heiress Barbara Hutton at the Woolworth family’s sphinx-guarded mausoleum in Woodlawn Cemetery, have a picnic in Sleepy Hollow, or spend a day at The Hartsdale Pet Cemetery , America’s oldest and greatest eternal resting place for rich people’s animals. If you are of a mind to travel, do not miss the spookiest family plot in all of America, Stockbridge Massachusetts’ Sedgwick Pie (it’s also just a stone’s throw from Edith Wharton’s house), or skip over to Rhode Island (my ancestral homeland) and take a tour of our little state’s notorious smattering of vampire graveyards.
Feb 28, 2023