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When I’m pregnant I’m gonna try the Mozart effect but with Charli XCX. So every morning & night I will take one of my Airpods, stick it in my belly button, and then blast ā€œGone.ā€ This is the best song in the world. I thank God every day I wasn’t born in the same generation as The Beatles. That would have fucking sucked!!!!

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Top Recs from @grace-kuhlenschmidt

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The tight underwire… The way my nipples are almost more visible… it’s so sexy to me. If I were to jump in the air, my boobs are big enough that if I don’t hold them close to my chest: they’ll fly up and knock my teeth out, and on the way down they will straight up fall off. That’s why I have to wear the least supportive bra to ever exist. Thank you scientists!
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and if it ain’t sara bareilles or imagine dragons, then seriously take me to the hospital🤣. lyrics like theirs are scientifically addicting (seriously) so don’t be surprised if others join in. but when they do, tell them to stop. why would they do that? this is your moment. don’t trust those people. trust me. after this the rest of your nights gonna be golden ✨ #hingepartnerĀ 
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I actually don’t recognize baby pics of myself because I’m not wearing this mascara. In fact, I didn’t wear any mascara as a kid… This clumpy ass, double-ended dildo ass, 12 dollar ass mascara is my best friend. If I’m not wearing it, I’m ugly. If I am wearing it, I’m fat Twiggy.