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ykno everything i used to do was for the plot, but i almost died several times and have dated too many losers to count just so i would be able to tell people about ‘the time i fucked the ax murderer’ (true story) . anyway i am tired and being interesting is overrated, let’s be boring instead, ok?
Jan 27, 2024
Related Recs
i forgot my headphones at home. i was about to either
1) pump black country new road
2) watch brooklyn 99.
i miss being passionate about things, not being able to sleep, eat, speak,
or fathom anything beyond the apple
of my eye and the fruit of my thoughts.
i miss waking up with one thing in mind, how i would explore it that day, and how i would explore it the next
it’s been people
it’s been sewing
guitar
driving
religion
philosophy
photography
writing
filming
blogging
i think, regardless of any tik tok data explosion with the intention of ripping out each of my brain cells to keep me submissive and docile because of a wrecked attention span, i’m not a girl of her commitments- i get bored.
and i am bored. i feel this lack of passion so deeply in my body, its been a catalyst for the recent crashouts ive had ( and there’s been plenty) i don’t know how to stay, and work hard, and allow myself to grow to what i want to be right in this instance. not to shine my own shoes, but i’m not super used to being bad at things. i’ve always always always coasted, and now that im trying to be a gaf (give a fuck) filled girl, ive realized, sucking at something hurts a lot more when you’ve put in the work to be good at it.
if it wasn’t me writing this, and my best friend called me and told me this word for word, i would tell her how normal that feeling was, and that she herself knew what to do; commit. and that is my advice, dear sweet amalia, commit, commit, commit.
Feb 18, 2025
🎞
there are so many characters and there’s drama and plots and twists and of course a romantic interest but then sometimes a character just starts doing jumping jacks and i gotta restart the scene all over again 🙄👎🏼😔
Apr 3, 2025
In this day and age of societal teenage-like anguish and ‘core’ frenzies, I have a confession : Locking in is a social construct i will never partake in, if only because there’s never been anything wrong with a little bit of silliness.
…So I want everything to be fun and a good time and somedays i feel like the world is a tilted stage on which i’m asked to dance? And if then I cry and cry and whine and I take a day off to journal about it? Sue me!
Lately I came to the realisation that I come from generations and generations of fucking losers who took a long time to figure out what they wanted in life and then weren't all that good at pursuing it. I’m not saying that I want to be lazy about my goals and aspirations — by familial standards i’m actually quite far advanced in this regard, but I will say loud and proud that I’m more than okay with a speck of emotional turmoil and doubt, if it means I can get a day off crying in my room and writing about it while sipping a glass of shitty red wine.
—That‘s how good art starts anyway.
Apr 16, 2025
Top Recs from @alexpoez
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you have a whole day ahead of you! there is nothing worse than the feeling of getting out of bed at 1 pm and negotiating about how to spend your 3 remaining hours of daylight. bonus points if insomnia keeps you up too
Jan 28, 2024
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its just hotter
nudes?
how about frida kahlo writing “nothing compares to your hands, nothing like the green-gold of your eyes. my body is filled with you for days and days. you are the mirror of the night. the violent flash of lightning. the dampness of the earth. the hollow of your armpits is my shelter. my fingers touch your blood. all my joy is to feel life spring from you flower-foundation that mine keeps to fill of the paths of my nerves which are yours.”
Jan 27, 2024
