đźš˝
cured my diabolical response rate & choice fatigue on what to do while i shat at the same time. literally just go through all the messages you haven't responded to every time u poo, set aside that time in your day to tend to your body & your relationships
Jan 29, 2024
Related Recs
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nothing haunts you like the texts you don't answer. good communication can feel like a chore but maybe if we treat it more like a game it'll become easier.
May 22, 2024
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As someone who has been a historically negligent telecommunicator, this habit is definitely one that has required some intention and tlc in developing, but boy has it been worth it!
First and foremost, this is a bandwidth godsend.
By responding to messages as soon as you get them, you fulfill your immediate duty and free up that sweet sweet real estate.
But of course there are also many downstream benefits that I will cover in as soon as I qualify a bit and explain the practice.
Qualifiers:
Obviously dont stay glued to your device, or stop whatever you’re doing, or get into more involved discussion when it is not the time or place to do so. And also in dating I think there is a real value in the air that used to be so natural and implicit before texting.
The Practice:
Very simple. When an inbound comes in and you see it, simply take 5 seconds to 1 minute to read and respond to it. Most things I find can be answered with a yes, no, or maybe so. And if it can’t, a “can I call you later” or “good question 🤔” or “let me see” might do the trick. And finally, if none of these work
go ahead and take your little time and respond later.
Downstream benefits:
People like it
Things get sorted out faster
Less falls through the cracks
No apology texts or excuses
less overthinking communications/more authenticity
Obviously there is no right or wrong way. I have a friend that goes read receipts, reads stuff, then, if needed, takes his time to get back to you. And I actually find that nice to be on the receiving end of because it’s always intentional.
But I’ve really enjoyed this way and practice and wanted to recommend it as it has added a lot of value in my life.
Aug 14, 2024
đź•Ż
okay i got some really amazing advice from fellow piffers a few weeks back when i was drowning with texts AND felt like a dick for telling my friends and family that getting their messages made me want to kms lol. but being honest about how i felt is super helpful so i don’t become a ball of rage. usually in a more gentle way, but being honest that texting isn’t a great way to connect with me is v important to foregrounding my relationships nowadays.
do not disturb really helped me take away from feeling constantly available to people. i see their texts when i get the time to, not when they *need* or *want* me to. removing the feeling of being obligated to someone’s messages has made me feel less awful about texts and calls. esp bc i am busy so often that their messages used to interrupt my day, my flow, my viiibbbee.
still trying to figure out why relationships feel like obligations to me rn… i feel like that is the core issue of my rage/anxiety feelings from texts and calls.
Nov 19, 2024
Top Recs from @madchen
đź’Ź
one night stand or future spouse nothing beats the anticipation.... the build...... the mystery revealed.....
Jul 23, 2024
đź“
the old-fashioned way, like you would before the entire internet was monopolised into basically three conglomerates. why would you spend all your time on your computer swapping between instagram tiktok youtube pinterest when you could find some of the coolest websites you've never heard about learning information your algorithm would never feed to you!!!!
a good place to start is your favourite artist's websites (not just musicians!) sometimes they have blogs (especially if they're writers) and often they link websites they like.
I also like magazine websites - the face, angel food, hot literati
or craigslist missed connections. I check the new york section all the time
Oct 8, 2024
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builds character
Apr 2, 2024