honestly what helped me was doing different hobbies
i always liked reading and writing but it wasnt until i decided to do a filmmaking course that my live for filmmaking came back
sometimes you gotta try new things and even old things to help you figure out what you are passionate about
you could even combing two things you love
its trial and error but definitely follow what you love or take time to explore what you do
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i get that this could sound a bit counter intuitive buttttt hear me out. i am currently 6 days into a gap year as i've just finished high school and was thinking a lot about what i should do with my time and this was the conclusion i came to. there are so many things i think are deeply interesting but don't know anything about and i know i won't go into a career in many of those things, soooo i thought i would excercise some autonomy and do stuff that feel like "a waste of time".
EG - right now i am sat in someones house in Hannover (Germany) because i'm vollunteering at a rehabilitation centre for people who have just received cochlear implants. i know that i will never go into the medical field but i just thought it was so interesting and i love people. I've done this purely out of interest.
this year i'm planning on doing more of these things; painting a mural in my room, learning how to make creme brulee, going to talks and lectures, learning how to play a sitar ect. none of these have anything to do with my career at all, i just think we can get so into our jobs that we never engage in anything outside of it. be radical and do stuff just because you can!!!! write down everything you are interested in (could be anything) and explore a way you can engage in them. THINK ESPECIALLY ABOUT THE THINGS YOU LIKE BUT ARE NOT NATURALLY GOOD AT!!
soz this was so waffley but i just found myself in the same position and wanted to help 💋
Jun 22, 2024
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mostly just doing the things that I’m somewhat passionate about.
often I’m used to tag around people and do the minimum of what’s expected of me.
so finding my own way through great emotional stimulation is the thing that works lately. (even though I don’t have certain life goals etc)
maybe a change of scenery?
or doing more things that excites you?
I think that sometimes great decisions don’t stem from a certainty so don’t dwell on not knowing what to do. I accepted that it’s normal and the best thing for me is to do things that make me happy
Apr 22, 2024
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just move towards one thing that makes you happy, one go at a time. if it becomes a pattern, think about what it is about the thing that makes you happy. move towards it, one diy, one event, one forum at a time. also know that you can reinvent yourself hundreds of times in this lifetime, so goals are arbitrary. what matters is that you spend most of your days with at least a bit or a lot of joy. oh also remembering that your career ≠ what fulfils you. sometimes we work just to have $$ to do what we really want to do (cook/draw/knit/make music etc). in the end, your life will be made up of many small moments, so just try to enjoy yourself. at least that’s how i do it :)
Apr 22, 2024
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using A.I. for art instead of using it to fix problems such as poverty, climate change etc is fucking weird
art is a way people cope with human existence and express feelings as well as share and pass down culture
why tf is A.I. in the mix
its weird to me
Jun 2, 2024
i like to wear lipstick on my upper lip but not the bottom
its v rare when i do
i been doing this since HS honestly and i love it
Jun 19, 2024
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TW: drugs and psychosis
i was in active addiction 4 years ago and was going on a 4 day streak of a bender
where i decided to go to a party do meth (ik) and drink and smoke (more) weed
i was so out of it that when i had to leave
(never drive UTI) it looked like i was driving through a forest under water
when i got back to my friends place her mom said their family cat (who was v old) was dying and she wanted us to say good to him
when i looked at the cat it looked like it was turned inside out and its inside were rotting
i felt sick to my stomach and hid in her room where i began to question everything
what i had seen, what i was doing, and finally who i was and if the thoughts i had were mine or someone else's- it was a lot
it was from there i kinda realized there was more and now im here
sober and a changed woman
the end
Jul 5, 2024