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Mike Mills' film Beginners is actually what made me start my Substack. After the credits rolled and the screen went black, I kept walking around, talking to friends and family, unable to shut up about it. I had to keep grinding down the topic of love, how bad people are at it, and how childlike we are in it, over and over again. Then, while watching Fire of Love, I realized Miranda July (recent author of All Fours and another current obsession of mine) was narrating it. Looking at her Wikipedia page I realized that the two of them are MARRIED. They have the most beautiful photo together, young and in love and in bed. When I look at it I try to imagine if they, like me in all my relationships, were also bad at loving and being loved in the beginning.Â
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Mike Mills just gets it. The beauty of life. The pain of life. All the things that conform a human experience and make it so rare and precious and unique. Each life is different, every life is the same.
Jan 23, 2024
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i'm never on youtube, but today i was and i randomly clicked on this movie by a creator i know for his shorter sketches, Joel Haver. the movie is not really my thing— the acting is not very good and the script takes unnecessary turns at certain points, but it is definitely a new style of screenwriting that I haven't really seen.
but that's all besides the point because the first two minutes are amazing and I think really a simple and beautiful way to talk about falling in love. i wish the sound mixing was better but it still i think strikes a chord.
Oct 1, 2024
Directed by Mike Mills & starring Ewan McGregor, Mélanie Laurent, and Christopher Plummer-- I think of this movie often & feel like it profoundly changed me.
It's a poignant story about a man falling in love after his father, who came out as gay late in life, passes away. It's about grief and love, about joy, loneliness, and connection...then how all of those emotions intercede and collide with the events in one's life to inform who we are now and who we are becoming...
For me, this film is beautiful, transcendent catharsis. Consume away! (& if you like it, I also like C'mon, C'mon by the same director)
May 13, 2024
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Everyone is busy. Everyone is booked up. It has become to new norm to fill my Google Calendar with dinner plans and late-night events, fully scheduled two to three weeks in advance. Resisting this adult timetable, drop-in culture still exists with a bit more brute force, it's texting beloved besties that I'm around the corner—can I come over for a coffee or a chat?—then breezing through on to my errand of the day or whatever else I have going on.
Sep 18, 2024
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It’s important to note that my Amazon dilemma is particularly potent because I used to have a firm belief that the next book I bought had to be in-store. This was, in part, inspired by Fran Lebowitz (someone I both love and fear), who says you have to touch a book in person to truly decide on it.
But as I continued to shop in-store for my books in East London, I found that a type of hyper-curation takes place. Many bookstores, whether chains or independent, carry the same selection. This makes sense, as stores need to invest in books that are more likely to sell, but it also means shoppers are led into a quasi-algorithmic experience of book shopping. To find more niche titles, you almost always have to turn to online sources (see above). To find a happy medium, I’ve started using the resale site World of Books. You can find pretty much anything and everything there. and always at a discount
Sep 18, 2024
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In university, I needed a really strict environmental setup to even think about starting an essay. I needed my water bottle, a good table in the library, enough sleep, and a full belly. The library had to be quiet, and in more extreme cases, I even brought earplugs.
Lately, during my lunch hour at my nine-to-five job, I've been using the time to write, often tucked away or sitting on the floor around the office. I tap away at whatever I can get down, to later return to and edit. I have to take these stolen moments. I'm too hazy in the morning to write, and too tired of looking at screens in the evening. Weekends are often sacred for friends and rest. I think, for many of us, the new habit of writing won’t be glorious, long-haul manic frenzies. It’ll be about taking sips here and there, getting down on the page whatever we can.
Sep 18, 2024