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Ugh I feel you and that is rough! Itâs hard because everybody has different standard of messiness. Sometimes it simply comes down to a skills issue. Hard to know but honestly itâs not for you to figure out, thatâs for him!
With that being said, since this is your friend, I think that you should be open with him about how you feel while also making it clear you want to work together to figure something out. Iâve done chore charts with roommates in the past and that really worked out well. I think itâs important that you have some things in mind but also make it a collaborative effort so he doesnât feel like you are just putting these demands on him. He will be much more likely to follow through if he helped create it.
I suggest also being very clear with yourself (and him) about what things are most bothersome for you that you really need to have a hard boundary around, and what things you can let slip. I say this because if you are giving that same energy to everything it is going to make things emotionally difficult for you. if he has been living this way thus far, thereâs going to be a margin of error here. So I wouldnât necessarily share what the less important things are, but the most important things.
This is going to be an ongoing process. You might find that some things are working really well and other things arenât, so you come together to figure out how you can adjust to make it work better. I do think that this conversation really needs to happen though because resentment can build up really easily, especially if youâve mentioned it before and nothing has happened.
Sep 18, 2024
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- be a good communicator. if you have a problem or are unclear on something or need to make something clear one cannot expect anyone to have the same norms. talk and be on the same page and establish that dynamic for the inevitable times it needs to happen
- figure out respective grocery + dishes + cookware + general belongings ecosystem. some houses can just be communal some have to be separate. depends on who yall are. gotta know which and gotta respect it
- just clean everything you were using in a public space if you donât intend to keep using it
i feel like when i had roommates our biggest issues were not figuring these things out. but just talking about everything is the biggest one that way if someone is disappointed or angry about something itâs either based in reality or itâs not
May 22, 2024
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if it's your friend you can be gentle but direct. you can explain that you think the common spaces should be respected more, and even offer to help clean it up with them the first time around (though if it's strictly their mess that shouldn't be the norm). honesty is the best policy here, so if it keeps being an issues, have another convo.
Sep 18, 2024
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Iâve had generally really good roomie experiences. however, itâs very easy to find yourself sick of a situation. the best thing is to just establish boundaries early and communicate grievances clearly and fairly. I think most people are generally receptive and respectful of others but some take it as personal attacks and then thatâs where it can get messy. however, itâs very possible for it to be peaceful coexistence with good talking. hope it goes well!
May 2, 2025
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May 31, 2025
In Tarot, The Fool is the first card in the Major Arcana, which represents the life cycle. These cycles we are continuously going through in our lives, not just once. The final card of the Major Arcana is The World (which I have tattooed very large on my thigh), which signifies the completion of a cycle and natural ascension into the next. We are then thrust back into the Fool, with a bit more wisdom.
The Fool as an archetype is one of joy, curiosity, spontaneity, and trust. The Fool is pure of heart, knowing that the Universe has got their back. This innate trust allows The Fool to be playful, to take risks, and truly believe everything will work out. The more we go through life and experience loss, grief, heartache, trauma, the harder it becomes to embrace this energy. Iâve found that as healing goes on, just as itâs shown in tarot, we return to this natural state of being. We start off as The Fool when we are wee little babies, and if we are lucky can return there a few cycles at a time, with more wisdom gained each time. Â
The goal of The Fool is to have positive experiences, maybe for fun, maybe to grow. There is an acceptance with The Fool, a kind of âthis is what is, how can I make this work well for me?â Everything works out for The Fool because they donât know it canât. Anything we go through in life, we can use to grow. I personally believe we all could benefit embracing the archetypal energy of The Fool a bit more. The Fool doesnât stop to worry what other people will think! The Fool does not fret about what ifâs! The Fool is in the moment!
Jun 1, 2025
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Humans have always danced. It is part of who we are, yet we have been conditioned to be self conscious, to think that we do not move our bodies good enough. Dancing is beyond judgement. Dancing is not a skill, it is our soul moving through our bodies, expressed in movement. Dancing is healing. Dancing is bodily autonomy. Dancing is FUN! Any feeling you are feeling can be moved through with dance yet even alone, you fear looking foolish. Kill the judge in your mind, shut the fuck up, and MOVE đ
Apr 24, 2025