☕
there’s something quite melancholy and cathartic about it, like wow, I’m old enough and I’ve been living in this neighborhood long enough to start to be recognized as a familiar face. i love that i can walk into my favorite coffee shop and be greeted as a friend, by baristas who know exactly my coffee particularities but don’t frown if i want something different from my usual order. it feels especially comforting on days i miss home and feel kind of alone, kind of afraid of being an adult. being a regular is feeling seen and known even by relative strangers, with whom you can connect over a comforting drink or meal! this is just one of the ways i love to cultivate a sense of home and community in my coming-of-age years— it’s so grounding to experience familiarity especially when you’re adjusting to living alone, recently moved to a new city, or otherwise needing to feel settled during tumultuous times!
Nov 11, 2024
Related Recs
☕
It just feels like a breath of fresh air in this digital age - got an old-timey feel to it.
Feb 26, 2025
☕
I know I’m sooo late to this (Im not a coffee drinker!)- I recently started being a coffee shop regular. It’s enlightening to have a place to chat, run into friends, read, and try new drinks. Sometimes these things feel limited to only alcohol-centric spaces and it’s great to have a spot to unwind after work each day. Chai lattes forever and always ❤️
Jul 31, 2024
☕
I'm sitting in the nearest coffee shop to where I live, which happens to be a Starbucks. When I walked in, the manager said "Good morning, Matt."
I've only been coming here a few months, one or two times a week, but it now it feels a bit like home.
— you may be looking for a different type of third place rec though, a place where you can definitely build community, and there's no guarantee of that at a coffee shop.
My impulse for me is to assume I'm not alone in this need/desire and to start something. Any place can become that third place, now the challenge is just getting people to join you there.
While still in college, I plastered "reading aloud night" posters around the campus and invited people to bring something to read aloud to others: either their own work or a favorite snippet from another author. A half dozen people came and we hung out until late in a common area—and then kept doing it. Some beautiful friendships started in that little group.
Sep 28, 2024
Top Recs from @antifabricated
🗣
undoubtedly my favorite conversational invocation. i use it a lot and i love to hear it.
imploring someone to tell you more shows such deep interest, attention, and love! curiosity is always the answer; learn more before you pass a judgment.
Nov 7, 2024
🌅
i love being up early even when i don’t have morning plans. i can take my time enjoying breakfast, playing my little games, journaling, and stretching all without a rush. easing into the day and reveling in the quiet, gentle morning hours is a blessing! time feels more spacious!
Nov 9, 2024
🕰
as opposed to multitasking. hustle culture pushes me to be maximally productive and spread between many things at once but i find it much better to pour myself into one thing at a time. this is when i can pay the closest attention and really see what's in front of me. it is also much more relaxing for my nervous system bc my brain is not overflowing while trying to keep track of many things at one time. it can just be present with what i am experiencing. everything i do of far higher quality when i am fully there for it!
this can be hard to do when shortform media has compromised your attention span but it is so fulfilling. some things that can help/things i practice are keeping only relevant tabs open for a given topic, playing music to retain mind orientation, and completely wrapping up thoughts before i exit a work period so there aren't loose ends i'll worry about. some good presence practices i like (circumstances and time allowing) are
- eating a meal with no distractions (no phone, tv show, book)
- going for a quiet walk ie without music or podcast
- making myself not look at my phone during my commute walks
- keeping phone on do not disturb especially during conversations with friends, study times, classes
- keeping a to-do list and picking just one thing to focus on for now
remember that time is plentiful and not everything must be done at once <3
Nov 14, 2024