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undoubtedly my favorite conversational invocation. i use it a lot and i love to hear it.
imploring someone to tell you more shows such deep interest, attention, and love! curiosity is always the answer; learn more before you pass a judgment.
Nov 7, 2024
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I love to ask what people are currently “in to” - meaning current inspirations, fixations, interests, etc.
1. It’s subtle but revealing- I now know what you are interested in and get a hint at how you view life (ex. some interests can be perceived as narcissistic/surface level vs. thoughtful/curious) *Granted, not eveyone will have a good answer (or may not even be able to answer) and that will tell you all you need to know!!
2. Naturally we love to talk about ourselves and our passions so it will certainly keep the conversation going. Extra points for asking questions about what they say (maybe you’re interested, maybe you’re not- but at least it’s not awkward anymore)
May 22, 2025
🤝
Wanting to genuinely get to know someone without an agenda should be the new currency.
Thinking someone is interesting and wanting to know a bit of their story is what makes this experience human.
These types of exchanges are boosting the frequencyyyy.
Listening without biased judgement is the most compelling you can be.
I have learned I can't figure out who I am without other people.
May 30, 2025
in the depths of the pandemic i was roasting coffee in a warehouse in sand city, ca, basically in my airpods for 18 months straight, and i listened to thousands of hours of interviews.
the best journalists, podcasters, writers, speakers, comedians, really eloquent folks of all types, all do this. check me on it. sarah koenig of npr / serial fame is the goat, but everyone does it.
reminding yourself to do this is reminding yourself to be present, to actually be interested in being interested. and, it feels good when folks find you interesting, so these people that you are now coincidentally more interested in will also like you more.
Apr 28, 2025
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there’s something quite melancholy and cathartic about it, like wow, I’m old enough and I’ve been living in this neighborhood long enough to start to be recognized as a familiar face. i love that i can walk into my favorite coffee shop and be greeted as a friend, by baristas who know exactly my coffee particularities but don’t frown if i want something different from my usual order. it feels especially comforting on days i miss home and feel kind of alone, kind of afraid of being an adult. being a regular is feeling seen and known even by relative strangers, with whom you can connect over a comforting drink or meal! this is just one of the ways i love to cultivate a sense of home and community in my coming-of-age years— it’s so grounding to experience familiarity especially when you’re adjusting to living alone, recently moved to a new city, or otherwise needing to feel settled during tumultuous times!
Nov 11, 2024
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i love being up early even when i don’t have morning plans. i can take my time enjoying breakfast, playing my little games, journaling, and stretching all without a rush. easing into the day and reveling in the quiet, gentle morning hours is a blessing! time feels more spacious!
Nov 9, 2024
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as opposed to multitasking. hustle culture pushes me to be maximally productive and spread between many things at once but i find it much better to pour myself into one thing at a time. this is when i can pay the closest attention and really see what's in front of me. it is also much more relaxing for my nervous system bc my brain is not overflowing while trying to keep track of many things at one time. it can just be present with what i am experiencing. everything i do of far higher quality when i am fully there for it!
this can be hard to do when shortform media has compromised your attention span but it is so fulfilling. some things that can help/things i practice are keeping only relevant tabs open for a given topic, playing music to retain mind orientation, and completely wrapping up thoughts before i exit a work period so there aren't loose ends i'll worry about. some good presence practices i like (circumstances and time allowing) are
- eating a meal with no distractions (no phone, tv show, book)
- going for a quiet walk ie without music or podcast
- making myself not look at my phone during my commute walks
- keeping phone on do not disturb especially during conversations with friends, study times, classes
- keeping a to-do list and picking just one thing to focus on for now
remember that time is plentiful and not everything must be done at once <3
Nov 14, 2024