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These past few weeks my mind has felt so all over the place, up and down constantly where I struggle to understand if I’ve made any progress. Consumed by a constant need to keep my mind occupied coupled with a deep sense of loneliness when people don’t respond, I end up scrolling through social media to take up my time only to question if what I feel is justified or real. I try to ask for help but wonder if I should be putting my friends through my constant episodes of anxiety and depression. I’m trying to keep my mind occupied in more conservative ways, maybe this app will help.
So how come I can perfectly understand what and why yet I struggle to grasp and control it.
Dec 28, 2024
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my mind has always made it hard for me to fall asleep because I don’t know how to turn it off sometimes. I can think myself into an anxiety spiral if I’m not careful.
I recommend meditation. it’s still hard for me to clear my mind but the more I practice the more it helps. when something pops into my head I imagine turning it down on a mixer and it fades out.
not all of our thoughts belong to us. I’m learning to reject the thoughts that don’t align with who I am or what I want in my life. we don’t have to believe or identify with every thought that pops into our chaotic brains.
Oct 1, 2024
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Things that come to mind that I’ve tried:
Firstly, recognizing that it is anxiety. Helps my brain reframe the experience. I most likely didn’t do anything anyone is going to think twice about in a bad way, but rather my dang anxiety is going haywire again and is distorting things.
Loving boundaries with onself. I literally talk to my anxiety like it’s a kid. I give compassion to it, but also draw the boundary that I’m not just going to listen to the same shit over and over if it’s unhelpful. It’s not ignoring, but is is consicously saying NOPE. I’m not doing this to myself! Sometimes, I just need to recognize that yeah that was weird, wtf. But I don’t let myself beat myself up over it.
I also have some go to phrases that help me. Firstly, that no one probably cared or noticed the things I did. And secondly, so what if they did? What’s the worst that could happen? They don’t like me? They confront me? I usually come to the conclusion that while some situations would suck, I actually could handle anything. I’m not a bad person.
Then I distract myself. I practice mindfulness in the things I’m doing so I stay in the present moment. If my mind starts to go back to that, I see if there’s more I need to feel but usually I’ve dealt with it and just say NOPE! I’m done with that now!
I hope this is helpful. Sometimes when extroverting my inner process I’m unsure if it makes sense to anyone but me. But, I’ve been there! I think a lot of people have. And it sucks, but there’s a path forward 🫶
Feb 3, 2025
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i have been home from uni for a while over christmas break. i think about this often but i genuinely believe that uni has allowed me to grow so much as a person, to find the parts of myself that i really needed, and to understand the importance of connecting with others. and it is lovely to go home and be able to see my familiar environments in a new light based on things i have experienced at uni. but it does hurt me how easy it still is, despite all this, for me to fall back into my old habits when i am at home; being unproductive, doom scrolling, the way i can actively feel myself wasting time. i am aware that these are things that negatively impact my mood, and yet i still find myself caught up in them. i wish i understood why i do this. maybe it is the fact that i was working so hard at uni and i have simply crashed here. i have come to understand the concept of taking a real break fairly recently. but i feel as though a break should be healing. and i just wish i could read, or post on here, do things that i know will inspire me as default, instead of reverting to actions that make me feel worse. i believe i can get to that point, every day is a new day and a new chance to live it the way i want to. i am doing my best. maybe my mind is at conflict with itself; it needs a break, but also needs to feel productive, so it does neither. i am working on finding the balance. everything is a work in progress.
Dec 28, 2024
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