According to The American Farm Bureau Federation on March 4, 2025 the national price for a dozen eggs was $8.15/dozen. Here is a list of things that you could buy instead, and let me say, they are much more fun
1. Rotisserie chicken
2. Thirty two quarters (yes this is worth $8 but you could be 64% done with collecting a quarter from every state and that is way cooler than eggs)
3. 12 little tank tops on SHEIN (does not account for the moral costs which are way higher)
4. My love (currently priced at $5 dm me for my Venmo)
5. Six iTunes songs priced at $1.29
6. Eight rubber ducks from my local rubber duck claw machine game (prize guaranteed every time!)
7. Two months of Hulu with ads when you’re a new member and sign on for $2.99/4 months (but then you have to call two months in and speak to a man named Tod about how you need to cancel and cannot pay for the last two months because your Hulu budget comes entirely from the money you saved when you skipped that carton of eggs at the store one time and how you got Hulu as a last resort to save your marriage since you and your husband don’t spend any time together but he always talked about how he wanted to watch “Only Murders In The Building” and after getting Hulu you finally had a shared interest and during commercials you would make out like when you were teenagers in love, you know- before he got you pregnant and your dreams of going to university and having a career went out the window to raise kids that never say thank you or ask how your day is going- and how your marriage has never been better since you’ve gotten Hulu, but you are spending too much money on little Timmy’s soccer uniforms and Susie’s ballet classes that this $8.15 you saved is all you can spare for luxuries like Hulu and how you wish you had just bought the goddamn carton of eggs because then you would’ve never remembered what it was like when you and your husband got along and you wouldn‘t have to miss a show that you never even paid attention to or cared about
8. Iced latte :)
