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I guess I don't need to bore you with all this rehashing. You're omnipotent now; the forest and the trees and all the dirt beneath it or something. Does betrayal still sting in heaven? If I don't believe that Jesus rejects those who jump from chairs, which I do not, then I must also question the idea that death is a release from pain. I hope you're thankful that I ask more questions than you did. But in all of your terror and rage, you were just glorious, like a god from some ancient myth, star-crossed with his fate. I wouldn't change you, and I know I couldn't. But I'm trying to ask you something, because my heart still beats and for that reason I am selfish
Apr 11, 2025
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not religious, but tbh reading the Bible or any religious scripture blows me away with how beautiful and significant everything manages to sound. my family is catholic, and we had to go to prayer for a family member's death today. did I do any of the prayers? no.. do all of them probably think I'm a weird queer emo who is going to hell? yes but some of the verses were unironically so TOUGH. made me feel like i should be sitting by a stained glass windows, writing an epic of love and tribulation with a big feather quill.Ā
Mar 13, 2025
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fuck, i'm not even catholic anymore. it won't leave me. someone save me from this hell
Jan 9, 2025
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he was trying on a pair of tennis shoes.
he had barely tied the laces when he saw me, a bible salesman of 22.
i had experience in selling the Good Word
but i hadnāt opened up the book.
he leaned over to my bag
and smiled as he looked.
āi said some crazy things, you knowā¦
even though itās still all true.
i wanted conversation,
just to talk,
just to see,
just to be.
i wanted conversation cause i really wanted you.ā
taken back, i stumbled.
i had never met this man.
but his eyes were deep and kind
like heād known me beforehand.
ācould you spot me for a dollar?ā
he said, wiggling his toes.
i pulled out my leather wallet, flipped it open under my nose.
the green was crisp and fresh
but i hid it from his view
āi havenāt got one, my dear manā
he looked at it, then me, then YOU.
āi know you arenāt lying,
but what you say just isnāt true.
you havenāt got a care, a soul, or a good attitude.
i have need and you have plenty.
but you just wonāt spare a few?
but itās no big problem anyway,
i know your point of view.
i lived it and iāve loved it
and iāve lead it straight to you.
but i hope that i can leave it
without leaving you.ā
he skipped away with his new find
to an aisle out of view.
i set my bible down
because it became too heavy.
Feb 14, 2025
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I think I'm only attracted to men in theory. I like your little mustache and biceps, your little patchwork tattoo. But like don't touch me, don't come to my house, don't even talk to be tbh
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Every six months I realise how stupid I was six months ago
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