i've been diagnosed since i was very young, but one thing i still struggle to remember sometimes is that it's okay if your autism causes you to have trouble with certain things that most other people can do easily! it's a disability, after all, and it's not your fault that the world is not made to cater towards people like us.
i would also recommend identifying things about your autism that you're proud of! these can be as simple as "my special interest makes me happy" or "i see the world in a unique way". autism is not something to be ashamed of!!
finally, find autistic and/or neurodivergent friends! although not all autistic or neurodivergent people will be compatible with each other, i find that people who have similar humor and values to me are almost always neurodivergent in some way. being autistic is hard a lot of the time, but when i'm with people who accept and understand me, it's one of the best experiences in the world.
sorry that this is so long!! i wish you luck on your autistic journey :)
Apr 16, 2025
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Thank you so much! Yes these are great tips, especially realising the strengths and positives. I’ve been really lucky that I’ve had neurodivergent friends for most of my life (I actually think it contributed to late diagnosis because I had easier friendships than the stereotype of autism…but many of my friends are diagnosed now!). it definitely helps having other people who get it!
Apr 16, 2025
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i don’t have autism i don’t think, but i do have adhd, social anxiety, and dysthymia. i also am not accepted or supported by my parents when it comes to my queerness (which isn’t neurodivergence lol, but it often comes up when i think about “what life could be like”).
i often would get stuck thinking about how much more successful in life i would be had i been supported in the beginning. if only i had been taken to a therapist when i first asked for support, or maybe had my parents been more open minded about lgbtq ppl.. maybe i wouldn’t have anxiety about the smallest things, or depressive episodes where i can’t get out of bed the entire day. maybe i would be the son they could show off to their friends.
this type of thinking kind of consumed me for the majority of last year, as i was getting used to living outside of my parents’ house. i was very depressed and often fantasized about what it would be like if things were different. however, earlier this year, i think i realized that staying in this mindset really held me back. i was thinking “what if” about things that i now (as an independent adult) have a moderate amount of control over!! i could become the support and acceptance i was seeking.
it also really helped me to shift my thinking on my own neurodivergence. i often thought of it as one of my biggest obstacles (which it can be at times). but when you learn the right coping mechanisms and ignore what society deems as “normal”, it can be a little more manageable. for me, i’m very sensitive to noise and lighting. wearing my noise canceling headphones (even in public where i feel most insecure about wearing them, and while i do chores) and making sure there’s no overhead lighting has helped me sm in terms of productivity and living happily in general. remembering that normal doesn’t really exist and there are no rules to living, has kind of opened me up to a whole new world that i didn’t know was possible for me. living is actually awesome sauce, when there is no one in ur ear telling u ur “rude” or ”weird” or “annoying“ or “awkward” for living in a way that is most comfortable for u.
the ppl who turned away from u and hurt u just because u are autistic, were simply not meant to be in ur life!!! they obviously couldn’t handle ur autistic swag. know that u r the normal one for just living ur life, and ppl who try to bring others down or judge unnecessarily are the weird ones.. also society is not built to support everyone, so plz dont judge urself for having to find joy through unconventional avenues. that is a reflection on societal expectations and how flawed our society is, not on u!
anyways i hope maybe this helps a little. 🫶🐛 ty for reading my essay and sorry if it sounds so motivational speech core. it just makes me sad when i see ppl who have similar negative thoughts as i do when it comes to this stuff RAAAAAAHHFFFRRR 🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦅🦅🦅
Mar 18, 2025
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i think a lot of undiagnosed neurodivergent people spend their lives trying to live authentically, facing rejection, then trying to conform unsuccessfully - now that neurodiversity is less stigmatized, getting diagnosed feels like a weight off your shoulders because you understand that you weren’t just “unexplainably weird / bad / wrong”, you have a condition that can be “treated” / “symptoms” can be mitigated, and instead of shooting in the dark trying to change things about yourself until you’re accepted, you can work in a specific direction to get some kind of support towards living more authentically because you know something about yourself you didn’t know before
i think that you’re right and ultimately autism, adhd, etc. are names for sets of characteristics that are different from an arbitrary norm set by white supremacy and capitalism, but coming to terms with that takes some time when those conditions exerted such pressure on you and you didn’t know you could discount the system because you didn’t know it applied to you. i feel like at least for me, after getting over the frustration of being undiagnosed with adhd (which is different than autism specifically) it became a less meaningful part of my identity, but that couldn’t happen until i processed how much of my life was informed by that fact without me even knowing
Mar 28, 2024
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Meeting people in large group settings definitely helps, i find theres a very natural pull feeling to people that are similar to me and its wayyy more noticeable when im not hanging out with people who ive known forever.
Turns out almost everything i thought was unique to me could be distilled into a list of 💫symptoms💫.
Ive alway seen myself as a drifter/chameleon type, i think my brain just resents ever being able to be defined or labelled or categorized.
That was disjointed but hope that helps, maybe that made sense to you and you are a little more understood now :))
Jul 18, 2024
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i've been playing it with an emulator on my computer and it's so so fun... my siblings at home get to keep our switch so this is scratching my animal crossing itch until i go home for summer break! my town is called weeville (like the bug) ^_^
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