Rec
1.) Shave my face. I’m never without facial hair, so if you see me without facial hair, know that I just had a relationship end. New beginnings, it’s just hair, it’ll grow back.
2.) Rekindle old friendships and strengthen new ones. I’ve gotta find community again, and I know these people have my back. Lean on them, but don’t ask for too much, you gotta get through this on your own (but not by yourself)
3.) Gym membership. Just trust. An hour a day makes a difference, gets you out of bed, gets the blood flowing. You’ll feel better. Maybe not happier, but better.
- optional steps include: the requisite maladaptive habits, maybe slightly heavier drinking, resuming smoking, getting right back into the apps. These are BAD, but understandable. Don’t rely on them. Checking their socials. RESIST the urge, it’ll make you feel worse.
2.) Rekindle old friendships and strengthen new ones. I’ve gotta find community again, and I know these people have my back. Lean on them, but don’t ask for too much, you gotta get through this on your own (but not by yourself)
3.) Gym membership. Just trust. An hour a day makes a difference, gets you out of bed, gets the blood flowing. You’ll feel better. Maybe not happier, but better.
- optional steps include: the requisite maladaptive habits, maybe slightly heavier drinking, resuming smoking, getting right back into the apps. These are BAD, but understandable. Don’t rely on them. Checking their socials. RESIST the urge, it’ll make you feel worse.
12h ago
Related Recs
Rec
💔Honestly, it sucks especially because this was my “best” friend, but I’ve just had to go cold turkey. I’m already not online much, I get on here as my only social media really lol, but I still muted her stories so I don’t accidentally open them. I love journaling, if you don’t already you could definitely try that! Some people say the first good vent you journal about is when you really start journaling authentically so maybe it would be a cathartic release for you and also good timing to start.
Start doing more in your real life and not online. I feel like when we get our faces out of our screens and in the sunshine it can make us so much happier, which sounds like that cheesy advice everyone hates to hear but it’s true. Spend some time outside, walk in nature if you can. Come back to old hobbies or find some new ones. Enjoy yourself outside of the social media bubble where you might see memes or posts that you would’ve sent to your friend previously and now are only a reminder.
Learn to enjoy spending time with people other than them or with just yourself again!
Start doing more in your real life and not online. I feel like when we get our faces out of our screens and in the sunshine it can make us so much happier, which sounds like that cheesy advice everyone hates to hear but it’s true. Spend some time outside, walk in nature if you can. Come back to old hobbies or find some new ones. Enjoy yourself outside of the social media bubble where you might see memes or posts that you would’ve sent to your friend previously and now are only a reminder.
Learn to enjoy spending time with people other than them or with just yourself again!
Jun 8, 2025
Rec
🫂transitionary periods are never easy, and i’m sorry you’re having to let go of so many things you’ve come to find comfort in, but not having an immediate sense of what to do next is not necessarily a bad thing. I had a similar phase of moving home after college, and it sucked for plenty of reasons, but it also gave me time and space to settle for a moment and reassess what my path was.
for a lot of people, it’s very easy to follow whatever momentum (career-wise or personal life-wise) they’ve been riding during undergrad and follow that to the next immediate opportunity, and a lot of people find contentment that way! but having an interruption to this sequence provides you with a unique opportunity to interrogate some assumptions you may have had about your future. is this career field really where you see yourself? is this city where you picture yourself settling? are you following the expectations imposed on you by others or are you following your own motivations and values? use this brief intermission to mourn what you are losing, but also to consider what you might build for yourself when freed from the necessity of following whatever path you have been on.
if you don’t like the situation you’re returning to, what would be a totally new scenario that would be better for you? envision that, and if the idea is compelling enough, pursue it. until you develop that vision, you may have to do some things to occupy yourself in the meantime that you may not find a lot of fulfillment in. maybe you find a part time job somewhere. whatever it is, if you come to dislike it all you’re doing is tuning your compass. use that to inform what you might prefer to do. but stay occupied! trying and making mistakes and learning is better than being idle.
during this process - and it will be a process, be patient with yourself - find ways to surround yourself with supportive community. maybe that’s your family, maybe it’s friends you’ve maintained in the place you’re returning to, maybe you seek out new community in hobbies you have, or you have cultural or religious communities you’re a part of, or you find friends in the workplace or a third social place. at the very least, they will provide you an escape from the stress of this period, but you could also develop relationships with people who can work though this life phase alongside you. what’s important, though, is that you create reasons to get out and interact with the world. you’re going to be dealing with a lot internally, and isolation can lead to spiraling. who knows, maybe you find a community that is better than what you have left, or maybe you find people who motivate you to pursue whatever you discover is next for you and see you off into the next chapter of your life.
basically, you’re gonna have to do some growth. like all growth, it’ll hurt sometimes, maybe a lot of the time, and you may have to leave certain things in the past that you weren’t ready to part with just yet, and it’s okay to recognize and process those losses. but so long as you don’t resign yourself to despair, and you find a support network that can bolster your spirit, you can come back stronger and more prepared to head down whichever path this process leads you to discover, and with more confidence and determination than the path you had been going down before. best of luck, friend. I hope you find what you’re looking for.
for a lot of people, it’s very easy to follow whatever momentum (career-wise or personal life-wise) they’ve been riding during undergrad and follow that to the next immediate opportunity, and a lot of people find contentment that way! but having an interruption to this sequence provides you with a unique opportunity to interrogate some assumptions you may have had about your future. is this career field really where you see yourself? is this city where you picture yourself settling? are you following the expectations imposed on you by others or are you following your own motivations and values? use this brief intermission to mourn what you are losing, but also to consider what you might build for yourself when freed from the necessity of following whatever path you have been on.
if you don’t like the situation you’re returning to, what would be a totally new scenario that would be better for you? envision that, and if the idea is compelling enough, pursue it. until you develop that vision, you may have to do some things to occupy yourself in the meantime that you may not find a lot of fulfillment in. maybe you find a part time job somewhere. whatever it is, if you come to dislike it all you’re doing is tuning your compass. use that to inform what you might prefer to do. but stay occupied! trying and making mistakes and learning is better than being idle.
during this process - and it will be a process, be patient with yourself - find ways to surround yourself with supportive community. maybe that’s your family, maybe it’s friends you’ve maintained in the place you’re returning to, maybe you seek out new community in hobbies you have, or you have cultural or religious communities you’re a part of, or you find friends in the workplace or a third social place. at the very least, they will provide you an escape from the stress of this period, but you could also develop relationships with people who can work though this life phase alongside you. what’s important, though, is that you create reasons to get out and interact with the world. you’re going to be dealing with a lot internally, and isolation can lead to spiraling. who knows, maybe you find a community that is better than what you have left, or maybe you find people who motivate you to pursue whatever you discover is next for you and see you off into the next chapter of your life.
basically, you’re gonna have to do some growth. like all growth, it’ll hurt sometimes, maybe a lot of the time, and you may have to leave certain things in the past that you weren’t ready to part with just yet, and it’s okay to recognize and process those losses. but so long as you don’t resign yourself to despair, and you find a support network that can bolster your spirit, you can come back stronger and more prepared to head down whichever path this process leads you to discover, and with more confidence and determination than the path you had been going down before. best of luck, friend. I hope you find what you’re looking for.
Jun 18, 2024
Rec
💔1. it reminds you why you’re on this path and the light and hope that awaits you on the other side
2. it feels more satisfying than the, “5 tips to get over someone” articles due to the inexhaustible content
3. you could text him.. or you could seek out that dopamine hit you’ll get when you read a random reddit comment from 5 years ago that validates you in just the right ways and renews your strength for just that little bit longer! no depressive crashes here
4. again.. the VALIDATION. there is nothing new under the sun and you will get through this
5. the horror stories will help you appreciate that things aren’t worse than they are <3
6. you’re basically playing therapist and detective, stitching together overarching narratives you may have missed while in the thick of it, psychoanalyzing the reasons for this breakdown, and most importantly realizing just how needful this move was for both parties. it all helps in bringing a sense of peace
!!
2. it feels more satisfying than the, “5 tips to get over someone” articles due to the inexhaustible content
3. you could text him.. or you could seek out that dopamine hit you’ll get when you read a random reddit comment from 5 years ago that validates you in just the right ways and renews your strength for just that little bit longer! no depressive crashes here
4. again.. the VALIDATION. there is nothing new under the sun and you will get through this
5. the horror stories will help you appreciate that things aren’t worse than they are <3
6. you’re basically playing therapist and detective, stitching together overarching narratives you may have missed while in the thick of it, psychoanalyzing the reasons for this breakdown, and most importantly realizing just how needful this move was for both parties. it all helps in bringing a sense of peace
!!
Apr 22, 2024
Top Recs from @haydenaugust
Rec
A website with a collection of screengrabs from nearly every movie you could think of, and you can sort by film title, director, cinematographer, year, genre, country, etc. Great for visual references for lookbooks, or just to discover a new film you might be interested in seeing!
I've attached one of my favorite stills, a great moment from Chungking Express (Dir. Wong Kar-Wai, 1994).
I've attached one of my favorite stills, a great moment from Chungking Express (Dir. Wong Kar-Wai, 1994).
Dec 30, 2024
Rec
At my local indie cinema for a projection of the new Nosferatu, infinitely grateful I have a place like this I can go to see new stuff and incredible programming!
Dec 25, 2024
Rec
Just going out and picking up any kind of used physical media (books, CDs, DVDs, cassette tapes) makes the archivist in me happy, like I’m preserving somebody else’s story/ enjoyment of something
My personal favorite thing is VHS tapes, I’ve got a decent collection (all thrifted) and they’re usually the cheapest things offered
My personal favorite thing is VHS tapes, I’ve got a decent collection (all thrifted) and they’re usually the cheapest things offered
Jan 3, 2025