Rec | INSECURE HETEROSEXUALITY

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like when a man is so afraid of possibly being perceived as gay that it's noticeable in his interactions with his male friends - two guys chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cuz they're not gay type vibe. immediately no if they're also weird about being around gay men who certainly are not interested in them.
on the other hand a man being a little gay with his friends is whatever the opposite of an ick is for me

@shelbs

Jul 26, 2025

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@raven87

yes agreed. this did remind me though that I don’t like men being flirty with their male friends and pretending like they aren’t

6d ago

@shelbs

@RAVEN87 100% like just own it!! its only weird if you make it weird

2d ago

@marxinista

i feel like it makes them interact so poorly with women too. i was recently talking to someone about how some men’s (obnoxious) nonchalant-ness clearly comes from a fear of engaging in feminized traits (like caring, listening not just to talk, etc) and being perceived as gay, and it results in them being totally weird at best (asshole at worst)

6d ago

@shelbs

@MARXINISTA yesss absolutely it’s all coming from the same place

2d ago

@llq

agreed whole heartedly

Jul 26, 2025

@shelbs

@LLQ you get me 🫶🏻

Jul 26, 2025

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SOMETIMES YOU’RE JUST, IN FACT, GAY

Used to get icked out with men over the most insane stuff. Would “lose” feelings in two seconds over the smallest things (por ejemplo: I am not proud to admit… ghosted a man because I hated his sunglasses…). Thought my standards would always be too impossibly high, I would never find love, etc….
enter: my first serious wlw relationship. suddenly, none of that stuff mattered anymore. I was baffled. I was talking to my therapist about it one day and deadass said something along the lines of “it’s almost like… I like her as a *person* who I want to *spend time with,* and I liked the guys I’ve dated because I liked how it felt to have a boyfriend” and I remember her just looking at me for a long time until I was like WAIT HOLD UP
sometimes, the ick is simply a result of your internalized homophobia fam. consider this an apology to the male community - turns out I didn’t hate yall, was just playing for the wrong team
((real answer - the one thing that stuck? not tipping / being rude to waitstaff. instant nope from me))

@another_fig

5d ago

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@heumann

Jul 13, 2024

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Best i’ve received and given is dont fuck with dl guys

This is one more for gay/bi men or any person who dates them. If being out in public or meeting together is a no no or if they have a wife you don’t need to be doing that mess
Let them sort themselves out and don’t chase or get involved because it’s not as exhilarating or fulfilling as you would expect
More broadly applied to any gender or sexuality - avoid anyone with a great deal of shame regarding being around you

@aidanaguirre

Aug 5, 2024

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