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i asked my bf if he would be okay with me auditioning for a dating show. of course he says it’s whatever i want to do. that’s show business baby! i tell myself that i wasn’t cast, not bc i don’t have mass sex appeal, but bc i am a little ……………cerebral
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Apr 5, 2024

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This morning I had a date for the first time in a million years and I was scared and hadn’t slept so I called my friend crying and together we talked whilst I got ready. We agreed that I would just do my best and accept whatever happened even if it was weird or embarrassing because it’s fine to do things scared. Then I walked out the front door in my cute little outfit with my hair and makeup done like nothing whatsoever was wrong and I had that damn date and it was kinda stilted and he didn’t text me after but it was essentially fine 💃🏻
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I cannot and will not be able to tell otherwise. My partner told me “I’m crazy about you” after we’d met (we’d been texting for a few weeks) and I was like OH COOL HE ACTUALLY LIKES ME. I have historically been a dummy for lovebombing cause I only really respond to this, but I wish more normal people had been that direct then maybe I wouldn’t have dated so many horrible people before meeting Billy. (this is also why I’m so pro dating app, because at least you know the person at least fancies you without having the guess).
Jun 10, 2024
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— I said to the girl at the ice cream shop. And it worked. We went out, ate a pizza place, wandered around a park, drove on winding rural roads, listened to blink-182. She called me a few days later, wanted to go out again, but I realized that it was just a set up for trouble and disappointment, as she was pretty serious with the other guy. So that was that.
Mar 17, 2025

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