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Reading through these answers is brutal but here’s my interpretation of dating apps:
the longest seriously relationship I have ever been and still am in is from a dating app. they are not engineered to be built for short term use because they lose their value fast if people end up in successful relationships as a result. They’re not designed as a means to an end. they are a time and sometimes money suck and can hollow out the social interactions
However
They are the most easily accessible option and if you choose to explore that path, being as intentional as possible when curating your profile is important. Sounds sleazy but these apps encourage people to develop a personal brand or become product like, you have to “sell” yourself to demonstrate that you are a good fit for partnership. There’s probably good people out there who are well intentioned who want to find someone
I would advise (if you do it) to be specific about what you are looking for, what you like to do for fun, hobbies, and the right people will come if you have shared values. Or just have a profile with a profile pic and no bio and talk your way into things like I did
avoid: laundry lists of what turns you on/off, anything that feels inauthentic, such things
Apr 12, 2024

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very pragmatic response. i’ve been blackpilled on the apps as of late but if you take it as a necessary evil in todays world then this approach seems the least life draining
Apr 13, 2024
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royallmonarch input = output on these things! They can be sinister but we must look inside for what it can do, sounds woo woo but that’s my logic
Apr 13, 2024
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aidanaguirre nah that’s valid
Apr 13, 2024
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This 🙌🏻 I’m a fan of basic bio and a profile pic too! My bfs bio was just “Seeking someone to go get lost with. I’ll make you the best pasta of your life” and mine was “I love long snogging sessions”. This is also why I’m always tinder over hinge, hinge makes people not talk to each other cause there’s too many questions!
Apr 12, 2024
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Source: I’ve set up profiles for friends much older than me and I notice instantly that someone is unpleasant if their profile is a list of “nots” ”dont’s” or “no”. This is huge - also not a fan of - have a real conversation with me - no time wasters - no drama - looking for someone loyal those are crazy person alarms
Apr 12, 2024
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aidanaguirre not sure if this is uk specific, but the main one I avoided like the plague was “looking for someone who doesn’t take themselves too seriously” 🤢
Apr 12, 2024
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mouse rough translation to “I’m the one who has to be taken seriously”
Apr 12, 2024
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aidanaguirre exacctllyyyy also double meaning for “I will be offensive and call it a joke“
Apr 12, 2024
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Dating apps are the easiest way to meet people nowadays. I have had some of the worst experiences ever in my life by meeting up with someone on a dating app, but also my current partner and I met on tinder and we have been together for a year and a half now. What I’ve learned is be completely transparent with your intentions, learn to spot the red flags that someone is lying about their intentions, and be comfortable with something not working out even if there was some chemistry over text. If you have brought it up with your therapist multiple times, it sounds like you need to just pull the trigger, and figure out definitively if it is for you. You can get 100,000 responses saying “go for it!” but only you know what actually works for you.
Feb 26, 2025
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It’s definitely a good way to meet people and get your feet wet if you haven’t dated much in the past. But, if you’re looking for something serious, it might not be the best route. At least in my experience, the consumerist nature of dating apps makes it easy for people to toss one another aside in the hopes that they’ll find something better. Not saying that people irl are necessarily better, but the apps can be demoralizing for sure.
Feb 26, 2025
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Wouldn’t say I’m desperate, but I’m actively interested in a relationship, trying to move on from a past too complicated and dark to describe on here, but I feel that having that bond with someone and making endlessly fun memories would be a huge benefit, as well as sharing a part of yourself with someone who’s really special and deserving of it.
I know I’m not that bad-looking of a guy, but I haven’t really had much luck on the apps, tried to curtail my profile to be more appearing, whole nine yards. It’s getting to be a bummer.
Should I ditch the app and just let fate take its course?
Feb 16, 2025

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