it’s an emotion (heartbreak is like this too) that you are unable to understand or fully imagine until you’ve gone through it. it’s gut wrenching and you feel it physically. i don’t think it’s something you have to (or can) ever “get over”.
a lot of times people show that diagram of grief where the grief is a ball in a cube and the cube is your emotions/mind and the ball is your grief. and at first the ball takes up the entire cube. and the difference over time is not that the grief shrinks but that you get more space around it.
i think for me what i’ve come to embrace about it, as i’ve worked through grief with loved ones that i’ve lost is 1) yes, to love is oftentime to lose; but to lose is to have loved, and that is better than never having love in your life. and 2) grief does this weird thing to most of us where it pops up whenever you see or experience things that remind you of those you miss. and at first it is painful or maybe even feels like a nuisance, but i’ve come to embrace it. i am so glad that my mind HAS clung onto parts of those i loved no longer here and that i feel or think of them in those little moments. i don’t think you have to be religious or even spiritual to appreciate that one.
