Related Recs

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Believing marriage and having children is cool and sexy

I’ve noticed a counter culture movement brewing online where the emphasis seems to be on rejecting neoliberal ideas of individualism and increasingly atomized living as a sort of virtue for the sake of our children who would suffer at the hands of climate catastrophe or just the cold hard reality of consciousnesses. Accounts like @carnivoreaurelius or @saveyoursons offer practical advice about the benefits of high quality red meats, the dangers of seed oils, not sunning your asshole enough and soulless dating apps. They provide some respite from the nauseating reality of the current leftist ideology that’s left a lot of us childless at 30 because of eugenicist level logic like “why would I contribute to our planet’s overpopulation issue?”. Pundits like Jordan Peterson and Candace Owens have built entire careers off this grift of “no nonsense” steps to a better, more righteous life. Don’t get me wrong, are these neoconservative pysops? Sure. But at this point it’s just about choosing which psyop makes life on Earth tolerable for you. I grew up in a culture that shunned the idea of marriage and children altogether because it reminded us of the traumatic lives our female ancestors just had to accept due to their lack of autonomy. Some cope by stating how relieved they are to enjoy their 20s without the responsibility of family and that they have plenty of time not realizing how hard pregnancy is on the body after the age of 32 or how expensive it is to freeze your eggs or adopt. I was repulsed by the idea for most of my life and then it hit me about a year ago…without a solid partner and cute fat babies around, life is kind of a hollow boring nightmare.

@bianca

Dec 6, 2022

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Tl;dr what you’re experiencing is indicative of a cultural shift

I read once that our culture teaches girls and young women that they have to work hard and plan to get what they want in life. Disney princesses have to take on a lot of responsibility. Cis white men on the other hand don’t get those messages. We’ve always been able to coast along and our privileged position in society has meant we can end up successful without planning or withoutinitiative. Now men don’t get by as easily as that, and they’re lost as to how to go about it. They do poorly in school, they lack self motivation, and they don’t get their shit together. Huge generalities in there, and I’m plagiarizing an article I read, but it feels right to me. I do think there’s something to the idea that American men are not prepared to fend for themselves in life. So I can imagine dating us is frustrating.

@bee1000

Jul 3, 2024

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Her thoughts on blowjobs, anal, casual, ons, dating apps, your dating a bisexual, polyamory and enm

Fun to bridge generational gaps

@indianjones

Aug 10, 2024

Top Recs from @indianjones

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realizing modern loneliness is partly due to encouraging, celebrating niche taste, thus decimating shared life experiences

Water cooler > niche crossover

@indianjones

Oct 13, 2024

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Process and experience

So vulnerable, I have to be sincere. European and American art galleries historically are not only promoters of great art, they are creators of markets. That may be where you could shift focus. Your worth is that you are young, eating rat, living a life of passion, filth, messiness, body horror (per my comment on such) unique and unknown to those with money. They crave you, not for your art. That's worthless to them. The art, as photographs per Sontag in my other rec, is simply a receipt that they owned a piece of your lifestyle for a moment. No one who will buy your art will likely give a fuck about your art. Stop seeking those. Find the Glengarry Glen Ross customers seeking life, escape from drudgery, a need to prove something to themselves. Let your art be that for them. Enough bs theory, now for implementation. You won't sell your art, but you can sell the frustration, bloodsweattears, dedication, sacrifice that drips from your post. You can do so by simultaneously reminding yourself you are not creating ART but CREATING art. Your work and worth is not on a canvas. It's not the art. It's in you, the artist.

@indianjones

May 11, 2024

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Intervene, ignorantly

A model friend/client and I stepped out from dinner for a smoke and were having a tipsy discussion about an issue with her company. Some doorman came up to tell us to move because we were blocking the entrance, which we weren't. I was irked, but my friend guessed he likely stereotyped her being in a lover's quarrel. Irked for a different reason, I called out, "Dude, we're discussing business! She's my boss!" In hindsight, I appreciated how he handled what he mistook as a domestic dispute by creating a false diversion to redirect our attention. Most people get involved in others' drama because they think they know better. Most people don't because they're insecure they're misunderstanding. He was appropriately in between.

@indianjones

Jun 5, 2024