Yesterday evening I gathered with some friends for the evening. Because of what a number people have been navigating, this friend group is relationally disconnected and trust has been fractured in some ways. It's been rough. I'm surprised that several people came. I'm surprised that I came.
After I got to the host house, I could feel the tension within myself. Knew that in order to show up my best, I needed to unwind, consolidate, merge into my true self more than I was in the moment.
In the old days, before I quit drinking over two years ago, I would have wanted a drink. Something to calm the nerves, relax me, take the edge off.
But last night I realized: things have changed. No drink needed. Want I want now is a dance. So I drifted back out to the parking lot, put my headphones on, queued up "Hungry Heart," and started moving.
Swaying, swinging, flapping my arms, and unburdening my soul.
And then I was myself again,
grinning joyfully,
defiantly—
then I joined the others,
and was fully there for all that came.
"I need a dance" is a pretty damn good addiction to have.
Are you with me?
