i am someone who is either all in or not i dont like to half ass stuff because
1- i was taught that half ass-ing anything was a waste of my own and everyone else's time and time is something that should be valued
2- im just not someone who half asses anything by nature i am someone who puts their heart and soul into something and i wont stop until it is perfect
not to someone else but to me so if i know i can do better i will always at least will TRY to do so but this is low key so fucking debilitating in my quest to make perfection i am quite literally chaining myself
its all a balancing act that i always struggle to keep up with and maintain
so, i think that the polar opposite of perfectionism is shitism: where u actually want to do a task badly. u intentionally fuck it up and if u don't fuck it up, something feels inexplicably off. i know this because i often find myself locked in a shitism spiral/cycle.
yes i can write, study, sing, cook, talk better but why do i have to every time?? why is better always desirable? why do i have to prove the true depths of my talents & capabilities w every little project??
