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I have nothing to say
my head doesn’t want to be alone
So I will talk anyway
My phone screen is bright
My walls are white
My poster is pink
The sky is probably black
My ceiling is full of shadows
I forgot how to spell
But shadows are only absence of light
My ceiling is absent
If I think it is, then it is
My walls are absent
Then I am absent
And I am alone
And no one loves me
And I don’t love anyone
If love is an absence of hate
Then my friends are absent
And my family is absent
And I am absent
But if love is an extension of hate
Then I am full of it
Mar 21, 2025
Related Recs
🎭
and i made a song about you but it’s also about me and no one will ever hear it its called my thoughts and its not actually a song but the way music flies out of your mouth makes me want to say sweet nothings as i put my words with yours like a torn up half read book you keep by your bedside table that you tell yourself you’ll get around to. i play fast and loose with my actions around you, and maybe it’s too much even for me.
i try to distract with overconsumption of digital content thst just fucking overwhelmes me and gets in the way of anything getting done.
you’ll never read this by the way. but can i recite the pages of senseless amateur poetry i wrote about you?
i never really belong anywhere, and i camouflage into a current residence until i trick myself into thinking i truly know the people i’m around. it happened once, the effect that is. im not there anymore, and i hope those people don’t hate me like i hate myself for leaving. this isn’t about you, just me rehashing horrible guy-wrenching emotions of a past (if you can even call two years ago the past), and things i don’t talk about.
im the most observant person ever, and you wouldn’t expect it. i’m so sensitive, i pick up every little movement someone does and i overthink everything thst happens before and after a conversation, guilt racks me after any social gathering and i wonder if i said anything wrong.
but there’s so much to be grateful for life is so so beautiful im so lucky to be alive and have this device that i’m emotionally giving myself to and have given my life to. i love love, life, and people and i already made a long post about this im not reiterating. and i love how i can see you everyday and stand on the sidelines as your hype man in your game of love, ill hold the water bottle of my unrequited longing, ready to serve drops of my musings of you only to accidentally pour myself onto you.
Mar 26, 2025
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more familiar places yet distant faces,
oblivious to their surroundings, stuck in their devices;
memorizing their monotonous routines,
a common crowd; an endless scene.
awake before the start of dawn,
home after the sun is gone;
illuminated by manufactured light —
the sunless souls of a monochromatic life.
Feb 10, 2024
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14 lines one topic abab cdcd efef gg iambic pentameter (./ ./ ./ ./ ./)
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write even if its poo poo thats the point???
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wrote this diddy abt being in bed all day
(ed endings are pronounced (chang-ed))
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“Sickness”
Suns rise lungs depress eyes spine lay downward
Shifts beneath cotton wool illusion of silk
Such soft stills as the heart beats blood onward
Sores spinal cord twists stretch crackle joint ilk
Side turn legs cross eyes sore from prolonging
Silence as someone checks you’ve changed place
Slight defiance in latitude daylong
Same ceiling above responses in haze
Simple it feels to concave for hours
Stretching not standing or shower taking
Stench of clothes unchanged beneath cowers
So avoid your duties sleep awaking
See dreams gravity press patterns close eyes
Sick day sweet laughter you lay on your lies
Jan 24, 2024
Top Recs from @edduh-sahdeeyeh
♥️
Putting your hair up in a ponytail is so sick. Like, it’s all outta my face now. And it looks so good on people. More people should wear ponytails.
Mar 7, 2025
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The sky is so beautiful. I’m trying to tell time using only the sky. Today it was pretty dark at 18:00—darker than it usually is—I think that is because there were a lot of grey clouds blocking the sun. I think this because there were clouds earlier in the day too making the sky dark.
Mar 7, 2025
🖊
When thinking about tattoos, it is difficult to decide what I want since they all look cool and my style changes so often and everything is so cool and awesome. I’ve thought of a possible solution, which is: get tattoos based on my history and things that have shaped me as a person. Since history is in the past, it never changes, and I have to accept it whether it’s ink on my body or not. I’m taking inspiration from Polynesian culture here.
Mar 7, 2025