Related Recs

🙃

I’ve typed a few things out but ended up not sharing them

Not out of fear of lack of likes or engagement. I mean, I’ve just joined, but so far I think this app is pretty neat, in the sense that it doesn’t feel like a “oh, I’ve got to curate this thought or personal share until it’s whittled down and not actually *me* anymore - so that it’s more widely appealing or relatable” kinda thing y’know? Doesn’t feel like it’s about amassing followers, monetisation, or becoming an *influencer*. Pretty certain that everyone has had angry, dark, bitter, jealous, painfully yearnful, embarrassing moments and feelings. And the kind of thoughts that are “nope, can’t say that. that’s overshare territory babey”- or like there’s that feeling of “would I want that being screenshotted?” hanging over ya. I don’t feel disgust when I’ve read others share those things on social media or when my friends confide in me, but I still feel shame for feeling them myself? How silly. One thought that I’ve considered sharing on here, but yeeted into the void has been about my identity, erosion of sense of self, and self image. Existential dread, stential(?) dread. Which is, like, *yeah*, everyone (to scaled degrees, especially based on your race, gender, sexuality, class, ALL of the above) can probably relate to by virtue of existing in this shitty framework of a society where everyone’s physical, intellectual, and material image is always going to be scrutinised. Which I know? But I still struggle with writing or articulating things like “hey, I’m *not* doing okay with this and I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t like where I am, but thinking about change scares me. Sometimes, maybe all the times, I don’t know who I am or what I’m doing outside of the perception of others and that really fucking terrifies me.” I don’t know, I’ve deleted most other of my social media accounts and only really yap to my close friends about deeply emotional and intimate *struggles*. But I still feel like flinging things out there sometimes to strangers (which I guess I’ve just done here lol). It’s a different kind of vent release, a type that you don’t have to worry about extremely concerned follow up questions from friends or family haha. Or like, the feeling that even though we’re strangers from all over the place, we all share in the relatable struggles and joys of the human condition - whether through personal shares or *memes and shitposts* The candid pet pics are cool too tho

@softshelled

Jan 18, 2025

📝

POSTING WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT… KINDA

it definitely can be frustrating when you find a niche corner of the internet thats sweet and has its nice little community norms, but the more people join that community — if the norms aren’t super clear — the more those norms become a little obscured. i’m of the opinion that you can use the app however you want, WHO CARES. but it is nice to have a community where you have a shared language and norms :) i think that’s super human :) soOooOoOoOoOo my understanding of the intention of the app was that this was for recs and then asking for recs. but you can use artistic license to communicate whatever you want in either of those post formats. the difference i think is when people don’t pay a little homage to the original intent of the app, it can be frustrating for users who have this perceived expectation of what a post *should* be. honestly sometimes i am that person. i think i care *too* much sometimes 😅🤠 IMO — post whatever the hell you want but if you’re post reads like “i recommend [insert title of post here] even if it’s not rly a recommendation, i think it’s a nice connection to the initial community norms? i also feel like it requires some thinking and a little bit of cleverness and intention — which is so scarce on the internet that i’m sure people are like oh no mr. bill what happened to my lil corner of the web? well the truth is nothing is ever ours and everything is always changing, woof! OR do absolutely none of this and ignore this post completely! because it hoooonestly doesn’t matter :) i think we’re all just clinging to things and then when they change we kinda bug out because *gestures broadly at everything* I LOVE YOU PI.FYI!!!!!!! *to be loved is to be changed*

@chronicwebuser

1d ago

🎲

im here 2 meet creatives

THE LONGING TO COLLAB AND CREATE WITH OTHER CREATIVE BEINGS IS SO STRONG. so unbelievably tired of robot people that i now find myself shouting out into the abyss of this random website i stumbled across. not knowing if anyone will ever even see this, but i honestly don't care at this point im just over ignoring the gnawing urge whispering (now yelling) at me to put myself out there. despite this whole post reekinggggg of desperation, i swear im someone that has peace in their personal world of creative expression and growth no matter how unideal my circumstances are. im just very aware of the certain limitations that come with isolation and the certain freedoms that come when you push outside comfy ol'reliable, mr.solitary. i believe that collaboration with other creatives is a major key to inspiration, pushing boundaries, raw vulnerability, and elevating self: ingredients that produce truly delicious art. anyways, if your seeing this and agree with any of it or wanna support my art or wanna talk about cool shi etc. don't hesitate to interact, i swear im a kind person that just has a deep love for all art/creative expression and those who love it too (i say in hopes of not sounding extremely cheesy and creepy) :) xoxo, everywhere

@xoxoeverywhere

Jan 29, 2025

Top Recs from @jill_m56

✨

CHANGING AS A PERSON

i’ve changed my behavior in what i think has been pretty drastic ways recently. i have no idea why. and it’s really confusing me and sometimes really pissing me off. -i started an instagram spam/photography account. why? i don’t know, why not? i told myself i needed a new hobby, so i chose photography. it’s easy, it’s accessible, it’s fun. and i posted 2 things already cuz idgaf what people think, and i promoted it!  now why is this an issue? i dont post. i posted one of my cats for her birthday on my regular account because i felt the need to. i wanted to. but i don’t know why. she’s cute, sure, and everyone should see her, but why did i post it? there was no logical reason to. -on a similar note, i have this entire fucking blog. again, i never post, yet ive been posting on here like every three days. and its shit i would never tell people i know. i mean i ranted about my friends to random strangers on the internet but i will never confront my friends about what i was complaining about. i mean im using this as a way to get my feelings out cuz god knows i have no one to talk to. ok but this now makes me ask where the line between being dramatic and letting out feelings is. is me saying i need someone to talk to because im about to explode dramatic or is it me trying to be emotionally healthy? is asking for help me just being a drama queen or is it me looking out for myself? and then where is the line between sharing feelings and over sharing? is this whole thing me just sharing how i’m feeling or is this over sharing? -i have a crush that im allowing to take over my mind for some reason. which is really annoying me. at first it was a cute little crush on a friend (which, already a bad idea) and id just be delusional about it, but then i told 2 of my friends about it (more bad ideas) and im fairly certain he knows i liked him (oops).  but he also clearly doesn’t like me back, which, eh. i didn’t really want anything to come from it anyway. i’ve found myself wanting to experience what dating would be like, but when i think about it logically, it scares the hell outta me and disgusts me. like seriously e w w. see, i dont know if i actually like him or if i just want to get to know him better because i have no friends. hes a good guy, dont get me wrong. but hes just a guy. there’s no reason to be getting worked up like this.  -ive also just found myself liking my friends more. i used to think i was someone who would be perfectly content in flying solo my whole life. but now im starting to get why people have friends. cuz i really fucking love my friends. they are always so great to be around and are so nice to talk with.  i want to hang out with them. but i don’t know what they’ve got going on in their lives and if they’d want to hang out with me. plus i don’t want to ask, get turned down, and then it get awkward. (it’d be an awkward conversation. it wouldn’t stay awkward. but still)  regardless, i love hanging out with them in school. even if its only like 40 minutes a day, i love it.  -and really the entire reason for this, im becoming more outgoing! i’m going up to people more, im being silly and just more myself around people. i’m putting myself out there more! (clearly)  but my problem with this is that i felt like i was starting to become annoying. i sometimes annoy myself with how much i talk to myself, and ive noticed im sometimes like other people who i see people find annoying and this really freaked me out. so much so that i asked my friends if they thought i was annoying. they all said no, of course. 3 said that she likes listening to people talk and says that i deal with me the most. 4 said that im the voice of reason most of the time, that i don’t actually yap as much as i say i do, and that i could be so much worse like him (which idk where he’s getting that he yaps a lot (which is the same thing he said about me) but i digress). and 2 said that i feel this way because im becoming less constrained and more like myself.  and that all really made me feel validated!!! like i was friking jumping around because i felt so good hearing that my friends don’t hate me! they are all so damn kind! ❤️ but most people know me as a very reserved person. they know me as someone who doesn’t speak unless spoken to, who just sits there by herself, who is perfectly content on being by herself. but they don’t know that i like hanging out with other people and i’m trying to be more outgoing.  (ok sidebar. it’s not even like i’m consciously doing this i stg it’s just happening)  like i was sick the last couple days and lost my voice one morning, and my dad literally said, “oh no. you’re not gonna be able to be the chatterbox you usually are”. my mother once fucking described me as a “broken faucet”.  well i said how i was becoming more outgoing, but i just cried at the idea of having to talk to strangers ._. (crying in a church bathroom honestly is great) but, i’m changing, clearly. and i don’t know why. is it because im a piece of shit who sucks? is it because i see this working for the people around me and want that for myself? is it because ive given up caring about what people think about me? (it’s a lot this last one). or it might just be because im allowing myself to be me. i’m allowing myself to be who i am, to be my usual silly self, to not hide away my interests and opinions, to have emotions and feelings and not bottle them up.  i’m growing as a person, and i like it. i’m still figuring out who i am of course, im still young, i got plenty of time, but there’s nothing wrong with exploring and playing around.  also i’ll just throw in “Yes I‘m Changing” by Tame Impala at the bottom here. it’s self explanatory as to why

@jill_m56

2d ago

😆

HAVING SILLY THOUGHTS

i have a Note called “i think, therefore i am” where i write down all the thoughts i have that i want to document for whatever reason. and they are honestly really funny. (i think they’re funny at least)  here are some of my favorites -*doing math* “i blew a negative!!” the guy named a negative: 😏 -i am fueled by delusion, spite, and crosswords -eye contact is actually the worst thing ever -“you okay? you look deep in thought” “oh no. quite the opposite” -“i was- i was gonna have thoughts-“ -when your first crush hits you so hard you find religion -buttocks!!! -catching feelings? nah ur gonna catch these hands -who, what, when, where, why THE FUCK -“i have thoughts sometimes INSTAGRAM WHY DO YOU LET ME NAME A LINK BUT DONT SHOW IT ON THE PROFILE wait how long can i make this ok im trying to add the bee movie script but its not working oh there is a limit-“ -i <3 eye contact -*i drew Honse on my paper* my teacher: i like your dog me: it’s a horse… :( -friend that is a girl: i think im lesbian. i don’t think i like men me (girl): you have no reason to *turns to friend that is a boy* no offense- friend that is a boy: heh-

@jill_m56

May 5, 2025

🤝

HAVING AND MAKING FRIENDS

why have friends? because they make life slightly less miserable. they give me something to look forward to everyday. our stupid conservations about whatever bs springs up are so much fun and i enjoy them so much.  lots of my feelings lately have been related to my friends and i’ve unfortunately found myself questioning my status as friends with these people because of how little i talk to them. i see them at most twice a day and talk to them at most twice a day. i also barely talk to them outside of school. how about instead of sitting here and panicking about not having any friends, let’s look at my friendships with the four people i call friends let’s start with my best friend (she/they). i’ve known her since first grade when we met at summer camp. her and i have been best friends ever since. we used to be inseparable. recently tho, really throughout our high school careers, i feel like our friendship has kinda diminished. her and i really are just goofy together, we aren’t serious. (they legitimately told me how they don’t trust me with stuff that’s really dark and deep). which, as much as it hurts that she doesn’t trust me with stuff, it’s just how our relationship has come along. she only sees me as goofy and unserious, which is a large part of my personality, but i CAN be serious if needed. its just that i try to keep things on the light and positive side. when we hang out (which is happening less and less lately), it’s just absolute bs and them gushing over their boyfriend. which, i don’t mind. i just like that we’re hanging out and being silly together.  next is a friend i think is insane but also super funny. (she/her (she calls herself an ‘amorphous blob’ and i love it). she’s annoying as hell, it’s actually insufferable. but most of the time she’s tolerable. she’s an english and history and philosophy nerd, so she constantly talks about some book she read or yaps about the French Revolution or complains about the sentence length of the Communist Manifesto. but i’m a math and science nerd. really, we don’t have much in common when it comes to our interests. but we’re smart people with interdisciplinary interests. she’s also just a good person to talk with. yes, sometimes she gets very intense, but most of the time she’s a good person. i’ve told her some things i haven’t told anyone else (not actually true but she’s the one i’ve talked about it the most with) and she’s always open to listen to me complain and always willing to give advice. (and the same goes with me to her). she’s really not as bad as i make her out to be. we’ve all got our quirks, hers are just slightly more obvious and annoying than others’, but she’s good people. third is a friend i’ve made this year (she/her). i have memories of her from last year, but i became friends with her this year because she’s friends with my second friend and bc we have Stats and Lunch together. and she’s a good mix of everything. she’s more of an english/art nerd, but she’s not insufferable about it. she’s very level-headed and a good person to talk with. i really enjoy our conversations. she’s listened to me complain about my Boy Problems and has given my very good advice on how to handle it. honestly i kinda feel bad not having more to add about her, but she’s just one of those people who you just get (and who gets you) and doesn’t need a long description because they are just a good friend.  and last of the people i consider my actual friends is my only friend that is a boy (he/they). i feel like he and i aren’t actually really friends compared to how im friends with the three previously mentioned people, but i still like to call them my friend. idk they’re just fun to talk with (when i rarely talk with them). ok the more i’m thinking about this, the more i really question the evidence i have to call him my friend. i see him at most twice a day, and talk to them maybe one of those times. and just- idk it’s weird.  (this has happened twice a couple of months ago and has not happened since) i’d post a note on instagram about sumn and he’d reply with some random response, i’d have really nothing to reply with, i’d like his text, and that’s it. we don’t talk about it again. or sometimes he’d randomly bring up something that happened to him, which i really don’t mind. actually it doesn’t happen as often as i would like. I LIKE TALKING WITH HIM. BUT WE RARELY TALK BECAUSE WE HAVE NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT. the longest conversation we had was about a school project into college financial aid.  ok well, sometimes we do math together because we both like math. (we’re nerds, i know)  it’s annoying being in this weird limbo. i feel like i can’t talk to him without making it awkward. ok well so me and friends 2,3, and 4 make up what i call the “lunch crew” (bc we do lunch together) and honestly we have some of the best conversations when we’re all together. like we’re talking about the most random shit and sharing some semi-personal details (our sexualities) and i really appreciate how we feel comfortable with each other that we can share things like that. oh acquaintances. i should mention the people im friendly with (im friendly with everyone (well, most people)) but im not FRIENDS with everyone. i’ve got some people in my classes i talk to.  i’ve got one girl in my Calc III class that i enjoy talking to. she always asks me how my morning has been and we be goofy about calculus together. honestly i kinda miss her when she isn’t there :( and i’ve got a sophomore i once had one sided beef with but i honestly now admire him. he’s incredible at his instrument, and yes ofc being overshadowed by a kid that’s younger than you is annoying, but ive made peace with it and now i really enjoy seeing him work his magic. if he doesn’t get into Juilliard, im gonna pissed. i’m sincerely rooting for this kid.  “Why Can’t We Be Friends” is such a perfect song for this post. the singer is hoping to be friends with whoever he’s singing to, and i’m hoping to be friends with my friends and make new friends. i mean my relationships are a little less dire and more established than the relationship in the song, but the gist is there. lyrics aside - the song is just goofy. 50% is “why can’t we be friends?”, 50% is that weird psychedelic funk shit i’ve come to enjoy. i could have picked the original version by War, but the upbeat, faster tempo and the general wackiness of the Smash Mouth version i think just fits my situation better. (both versions are still weird as hell. what are these lyrics???) i mean i talk to people. i’m not a complete loner. i know i don’t really come off like it, and i certainly like my alone time (and often do prefer it), but i really do enjoy company. like, i went to europe on a “class” trip over spring break. and we went to pubs a couple times to watch a soccer game. now, i don’t care for soccer one bit, but i still enjoyed the experience because i was with my peers. despite all of this, i don’t know anyone outside of school. i barely know anyone outside of the 5 people i see everyday. i hear people all ‘oh i was talking with so and so’ but how the hell do you start conversations that last and are meaningful? how can i initiate conversations without fearing for being annoying or bothering? i never know how i can start conversations and not feel bad about being a nuisance.  so this whole rant comes from graduation coming in not even two months (oh god) and how ill probably never see these people again. i talked with my dad about this, and he’s actually still best friends with one of his friends from high school 35 years later, and he says that friendship is a two way street. if you want to be friends, you have to try. so i hope to be able to keep in touch with these people after graduation and into college, but im scared everything is gonna get too much and we’ll lose contact.  but such is life, i suppose. you gain friends, you lose friends. but im gonna hold onto my friends as long as i can. (you can’t get rid of me that easily) 

@jill_m56

May 2, 2025