😃
I feel like so many elements of my early twenties are making a return. Realizing I've never truly grew out of my old music taste. Many of my mystic visions are now coming into existence. I didn't even know how big they were until now. I'm curating my camera roll with intention. Craving pure dopamine. Collecting amulets. Choosing my words like magic spells. Feeling present inside my body. A quiet rebirth but also a return to form.
Jun 22, 2025
Related Recs
🔄
Something about right now feels very cyclical and circular, like I’m closing a loop.Â
The closing of my 20s maybe. Maybe!
It’s the sensation of going back to the same well with hindsight. It always comes back, right?
Making peace with the rounds and the bends of this, it’s good I think.
Feb 22, 2024
🦋
This could change when I hit 40 (lmao), but the older I get, the more confident I know who I am. I feel more and more sure of myself, and less and less concerned with how others view me.
My life is my own, and comparing it to other's is a disservice to myself and the path I'm now on.
Do I still experience guilt, regrets, doubt? Of course I do.
Do I know what I'm doing with my life? I might have less of a clue than I did in my twenties.
Do I still feel like a weird little freak, like I did in my teens? Hell yeah, some stuff just never changes.
I still enjoy things I loved as a child, like video games, Pokemon, stuffed animals, and giggling.
I still enjoy things I loved as a teen, like pop punk music, being annoying, and singing whenever the mood strikes.
I still enjoy things I loved in college, like dancing enthusiastically, writing amateurish poetry, and crushing on women who will never, ever be into me.
But now I'm just...30. More health issues. More scars. More silvery hairs that sparkle in the sun like some vampiric trope made real.
But also...more memories that sweeten with time. More time spent in awe and revelry. More reveling in the beauty of nature. More of my own innate nature revealed to me as I sit with myself more, alone.
I feel thirty, flirty, and thriving. I also feel as a child, as a teen, as a drunken young adult, bumbling around without knowing if what I'm doing is right.
I'm just doing my best. That's all you really can do; embrace how you are now, and how you are tomorrow, and again, and again, and again.
May 13, 2024
I turned 21 in february 2020, so, ya know. My world changed quick.
But truly I just remember trying various things, trying to define and undefine myself. Feeling what it felt like to stick to my guns, then readjust them. I was in the middle of what would be a 2.5 year relationship. I didn't kid myself with picturing a big future anymore than what was sweet, which was wonderful. I was living with a partner for the first time and felt like I knew what to do, like I was experienced enough for all the problems which faced me. but really I was just experienced enough to start so many things.
I was constantly bouncing between total pride and complete faliure. Playing house in a house I was actually renting with friends. Experimenting with what grocery shopping for myself meant to my life, redifining how I was going to live my days in the future.
The best thing I did in my 21st year of life was not be too mean to myself for not committing, and just committing to new things. I would go dance in the park, go on walks, edit music. All things I wish I did on the regular but regardless, by trying new things, it made it so much easier to pick them up, because I had a frame of reference for the world.
I loved being 20, as depressed as I was. That specific creativity is gone. But now I am 25 and know how to weild my own magic. The depth I have always felt within my soul has farther definition. Its like I put on glasses in a 7th dimention. Don't underestimate the beautiful growth ahead. Yes you are an adult, equipped hopefully to start so many new things. But keep up that internal work, and the years will be bountiful towards true inner peace.
And soo many more new tools to better learn how to tackle issues while still feeling like yourself.
u got this. stay true to urself but be flexibl with redifining who that is.
x
Jun 12, 2024
Top Recs from @buymeorangejuice
🕳
I told one of my best friends I haven’t felt like myself in our latest encounters and she then admitted she doesn’t feel like I’m as present as I used to be. I’m trying to figure out how to get my authenticity back. I need to feel like myself again.
May 31, 2025
🎵
I’ve just realized how much of an intentional listener I am. I’ve been trying to listen to different artists and genres but it kinda bothers me to just let the music play in a very casual way. Maybe that’s why I usually listen to same songs over and over again because it’s easier to be listening to them *intentionally* even if I’m busy doing something else at the same time.
Jun 7, 2025
It’s summer. The air is dry and it’s as hot as it could possibly get. Everyone has cool haircuts and smokes lots of cigarettes.
1d ago