There’s a term I learned that I have found very useful- insight junkies. It is when a person in therapy seeks more and more insight, but never actually heals or transforms any of it. This can be kind of an issue is straight talk therapy- okay we’ve identified the issue, now what?
When you clean out a wound, you need to stop messing with it in order for it to heal. It needs to have some air to breathe. That’s never going to happen if you keep picking at it.
Try things on. Get playful. Make mistakes. TAKE ACTION! Change is not supposed to be easy or comfortable, but that doesn’t mean it can’t also be fun and exciting.
Feb 14, 2025
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I’ve been thinking about this a lot regarding my plan to purge/organize my home, because the way I used to do projects like this just doesn’t work anymore. I can no longer wait until I have the energy, then do as much as I can in one go. I do not have the gift of uninterrupted time anymore. Instead, I’ve had to adjust to a more slow and steady way of working. I choose *one* space to work on each day. Often times it ends up being one drawer, or corner, or step in the process.
Logically this is great and the best way to meet my goals. Mentally/emotionally I kid of hate it because it’s not how I’ve worked for my entire life. I have big ideas and want to do them right now!!!! But, when is growth or change ever without a bit of uncomfortability or pain?
So, I am actively changing my mindset. I speak positively to myself about the one small thing I did that day. I share that one small thing with my husband and friends. Because in actuality if it was so easy for me to do, I would’ve done it before. So my effort deserves some recognition!! Positive reinforcement, even when it’s to our own selves, can carry us a long way 🫶
Jan 13, 2025
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To be upfront, there are two things about myself that I love:
1. I'm tenacious AF
2. I am generally a positive person. I can handle almost any situtation, and I've had to learn to actually ask/demand more, so it's not always great.
With that being said, I've wanted to die many times. I've experienced a lot of trauma. I have PTSD for years. Things got to a point where I knew if I didn't make really drastic changes I was going to die in some way- I simply could not go on how I was.
The only thing that started to change things is when I started to learn more about myself and my reasons for doing things, being with certain people, getting into certain relationships. Part of my whole issue was that I had major trauma from childhood that I was actively avoiding. So many things happen to us as children, big and small, that we don't have the capacticy to deal with at the time. But as adults, we do.
I remember the moment where things started shifting for me. It unlocked a hunger in me to dig more and more to why I was the way I was, and why I made the choices I did, in a really deep way. I became more action oriented in facing my shit, healing it, and discovering what I was like without it. It definitely wasn't easy, and it wasn't fun most of the time, but in reality the years I spent doing that are small compared to the life I have ahead of me. I'm a whole new person, but the parts of me that are true are the same. I became a more mature, loving, responsible version of myself.
Hating your life is a sign something is not working. If you're unsure what that is, go inward. If you don't know where to start, think about the very next step. That's all you need to do. You're never locked in where you're at now forever. Don't know what you want to do for a career? Switch gears and do a completely different job. There is no timeline. You can literally do whatever you want. When I was doing a lot of the stressful inner work, I worked at animal shelters because I needed something so low stress. And I was mid 20's!!! No career goals in sight!!! Not even anywhere in my brain!!! If you're straight up hating something that is taking up most of your time... just quit it. Life is too short.
Success to me is ease and grace. I want a peaceful, joyful life (most of the time). Sometimes to figure out what you need to do, you gotta take a giant step back. Or a step to the left. Or take a big roundabout. Or maybe a quest needs to be taken...
Dec 4, 2024
(specifically behavioural experiment — really putting my psych degree into good use huh?)
i don't know man but this really helps me get unstuck from an all-or-nothing mindset and the insane analysis paralysis from even doing the most menial of tasks
look just set it from a random number of days and put a random thing to focus on and see what happens
i don't even have to stick to it — this isn't even a "serious/legitimate" experiment at all — i give myself the grace to fail at this "experiment" completely and i try to take as much emotional weight from it as possible
the whole of point me doing this in the first place is ripping off the band-aid: any action is good action at this point, i don't want to ruminate anymore and i want to build momentum (even if it seems embarrassingly insignificant)
if it works out: good!! if it doesn't work out: also good!! the whole point of this is trial and error and honestly just bridging the gap between idea and execution and getting rid of friction between tasks as much as possible...
we can always change the hypothesis and the experiment... back to the drawing board we go!!!
Mar 27, 2025
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For some reason this brings me into my parasympathetic nervous system
Mar 28, 2025
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Humans have always danced. It is part of who we are, yet we have been conditioned to be self conscious, to think that we do not move our bodies good enough. Dancing is beyond judgement. Dancing is not a skill, it is our soul moving through our bodies, expressed in movement. Dancing is healing. Dancing is bodily autonomy. Dancing is FUN! Any feeling you are feeling can be moved through with dance yet even alone, you fear looking foolish. Kill the judge in your mind, shut the fuck up, and MOVE 🌊
1d ago
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FINDING SOMEONE ANNOYING AND IMMEDIATELY REALIZING IT’S BECAUSE THEY REMIND YOU OF YOUR YOUNGER SELF
OH BROTHER THIS GUY actually needs a lot of empathy and understanding
Apr 2, 2025