👁️🗨️
Incredible piece of work. Main guy says he’s trying to find a girl to spend time with him and a woman tells him to “take a look in a mirror, use a bucket of water if there’s no mirror, and use [his] own piss if there’s no water, idiot”. How do you come back from that.
3d ago
Related Recs
🔍
I'm writing a short film for @wgerardi to direct. It's about a forensics person bent on figuring out who keeps leaving a public bathroom stall a mess. Let me know what you think in the comments.
Here's an excerpt:
I measured the shit spray that started in the bowl, cut across the seat, and climbed the wall three feet. An anus would need to dilate 7 centimetres to build the necessary pressure to spray that amount of feces. To my calculations, I believe the perpetrator must have weighed at least four hundred pounds - yet, the stall is only four feet wide. How would one manage to displace that kind of body weight in this small of a space and shape without becoming stuck? I would find it hard to believe a human of that body weight could rotate their body the required one hundred and eighty degrees to sit upon the toilet, let alone allow the expansion of the stomach and flanks in the sitting position.
Nov 3, 2023
🩸
This guy who lives alone wakes up in the middle on the night bc he has to pee. So he walks to his bathroom but the door is locked. Thats weird maybe i just didnt turn the knob correctly he thinks. He tries again. This time it opens easily. There is a person he has never seen before sitting on the toilet though. What the heck!!! He thinks to himself. Maybe he is just having a weird dream. He rubs his eyes and opens his eyes. No one is there. He pees. He decides to wash his hands even though it is the middle of the night bc he is hygienic. Anyways, when he turns on the faucet blood comes out instead of water.
May 21, 2024
🔅
and then on the subway ride to work it starts kicking in and you realize the dose wasn’t micro at all... walking into the office, pupils huge, asking the receptionist if anyone is with the boss, she says no, storming into his office and saying you have bittersweet news (lie) and not only resigning but dissecting every single thing that is wrong with his cursed law office. it’s A LOT and he’s asking lots of questions, and it is all coming out of your mouth, the unhinged and uncensored TRUTH. you stay in his office for 4 hours, with a 30 min lunch break, by hour 3 the high starts to mellow and the vibes get lighter so you have a chance to chitchat and he tells you that his prom date was Linda Cardellini and you think to yourself, “that’s badass”. After work you go grab a beer with your two chillest coworkers to spill the tea and eventually get to the conclusion that, even though boss man is enabling an incredibly toxic work environment, it’s impossible to get mad at him because he is so hot.
Feb 16, 2024
Top Recs from @yuck
2d ago
Fag Puddle with Candle, Shoe, and Flag, Salman Toor, 2022.
It’s at the Met. I only ended up moving because I could feel how bad the security guard needed me to.
1d ago
This is the best car ever made. It’s my car but we can rule out bias since I believed it was the best car ever made before I had it. That is why I got one. I have linked to a 3D model of it so you can appreciate this beautiful machine from all angles.
13h ago