I used to feel that way a lot but honestly once you're with the people you like and something funny happens or you try a new thing at a new place you remember like "oh this is life". I don't know if that makes sense but sometimes feelings get complicated when you think about them. Feeling deep connection will ebb and flow with all people you know. I don't think things have to be deep to matter. Just experience it all and have fun with the little superficial things too.
Today, I kept feeling a sense of excitement and happiness, and I was constantly trying to belittle these feelings because I’m so used to anxiety that I couldn’t understand why I felt like this even though I have so many things that are stressing me out at the moment in my life, I have responsibilities and deadlines and people that I have to respond to.
You know what?
How ungrateful of me to discard these emotions just because I, on the surface, don’t have a reason to feel them. I don’t need always a reason to feel how I feel.
I think I just learned that I can allow myself to simply acknowledge emotions as they are.
I’m trained to dig deeper when it comes to pain, to understand myself more, and to understand how I can better myself.
I was never trained to just feel happiness and let myself embrace it.
I can feel a cycle breaking and it’s so freeing, I can feel that I’m growing and evolving.
And I’m grateful.
So please, know that you don’t need a reason to be happy, you don’t have to justify to yourself every single good feeling that comes up.
I don’t need to label everything or figure everything out!
I can have complex relationships and contradicting feelings!
I contain multitudes and I have plenty of time!
no more beating dead horses when it comes to movies, tv shows, etc. the movie doesn't need a sequel. the show doesn't need to go on for 27 seasons. we need more stories that are written with an ending in mind from the beginning.
best thing you can do for yourself is become extremely comfortable with being alone and doing stuff by yourself. at a young age i forced myself to get comfortable with that and now it's my default state-- i LOVE doing stuff by myself. my coworker is a person who literally cannot go places by herself and i have been trying to help her get more comfortable doing things solo because it's very freeing. everyone should be happy to go do stuff by themselves, it's lovely!
i will never get over polyvore shutting down. i used it obsessively and had hundreds of outfits made on it and mine were ARTFUL not like the stuff people say they saw on wattpad with like skinny jeans and converse and shit like mine were gorgeous. and then they shut down and i wasn't able to back up any of my stuff so i lost it all. HEARTBREAKINGGGGG