Rec
š
this was basically the message of an activist from an anti-factory farming nonprofit whose presentation i attended recently. she's vegan but knows it's not realistic to force it on other people considering plant-based food is not as accessible as animal products. that being said, eating plant based more often is a real change you can make to combat the horrors of factory farming and the negative climate and ethical effects it has!
a couple things i took away abstracted from the issue of industrialized animal agriculture: 1) the best way to approach someone who has a different opinion to you is with open ears and an open heart 2) recognizing our common humanity is of utmost importance 3) it's not productive to shame people for aspects of their lifestyle that are, well, not up to them and the product of larger circumstances/social conditioning 4) create mutual dialogues where both parties can learn more about each other rather than pointing fingers or immediately jumping to anger or hostility. tell them where you're coming from, and try to understand the same for them. (of course in some scenarios, with sufficient information, immediate anger is warranted!) 5) don't assume you know everything about someone else's situation and beliefs; instead, ask and clarify!
all this to say that the answer is always love and listening <3
a couple things i took away abstracted from the issue of industrialized animal agriculture: 1) the best way to approach someone who has a different opinion to you is with open ears and an open heart 2) recognizing our common humanity is of utmost importance 3) it's not productive to shame people for aspects of their lifestyle that are, well, not up to them and the product of larger circumstances/social conditioning 4) create mutual dialogues where both parties can learn more about each other rather than pointing fingers or immediately jumping to anger or hostility. tell them where you're coming from, and try to understand the same for them. (of course in some scenarios, with sufficient information, immediate anger is warranted!) 5) don't assume you know everything about someone else's situation and beliefs; instead, ask and clarify!
all this to say that the answer is always love and listening <3
Nov 10, 2024
Related Recs
Rec
šnobody understands how freeing it is to truly be what others call āchill.ā that mindset is the most freeing of all, to not judge others upon first glance is a gift only few are naturally blessed with. of course, many learn how to be more accepting and carefree throughout life and experience, and that is to also be accepted. though what i have seen on other social media platforms is just exhausting. the key to being a truly open minded person is remembering itās their life, not yours. people can live it and express themselves however they like as long as it doesnāt harm themselves and especially others. this can go from blue hair and piercings to dyed platinum hair and neon clothing. i used to call myself open minded until i realized it was only on one side. i was very accepting of alternative fashion and lifestyle that i absolutely ripped on things that are associated with the ānorm.ā i came to the realization that even though i choose not to live that way, that does not make it okay to tell people what theyāre doing is wrong or stupid. they do it because it is THEIR life, i simply wouldnāt do it because thatās MY life and it does not align with me. this obviously goes further into topics of social issues and politics, though the first and most critical step to approaching deeper rooted misunderstandings regarding those topics would be the ability to properly argue. this should be basic knowledge, though tiktok and instagram (and media in general) is forgetting how to civilly debate. one must thoroughly hear out the other without insulting and/or interrupting, and then respond after the other has said their piece. active research of the points being discussed is crucial for all around understanding other perspectives. that advice goes for small arguments in comment sections to full on debates in professional settings. some may say this segment trailed off, though that only proves how far being open minded can get someone. we should not be closed off, calling things different to us ācringeā or dismissing others for their different ways of life.
TLDR/important takeaway: never judge anyone unless their way of life negatively affects themselves and/or others. when in disagreement, always put yourself in the otherās perspective and actively research.
TLDR/important takeaway: never judge anyone unless their way of life negatively affects themselves and/or others. when in disagreement, always put yourself in the otherās perspective and actively research.
Rec
āI fully acknowledge my privilege this recommendation. I have the privilege to be able to build bridges because, though I am able to be dismissed because I'm a femme-presenting woman, I am much less viscerally threatened in general because I am white.
That being said, I feel like I have turned a new leaf in that I largely refuse to contribute to in-fighting discussions. In my mind, we are all in a race against the 1% but they have tricked us into thinking we are in a race with each other. I have decided to let go of the race. I have decided that whether they fear, pity, hate, whatever me, I'm going to value "the opposition" as people and when they are able to figure out who we should be actually fighting, I will be there happy to provide resources and supplies that I have in the aid of this goal. Until then, I'll be around.
The isolation that has been bred since long before I was born has just destroyed a sense of community, something that I yearn so much for. I know that people do things that bring me harm. For instance, I still take many COVID precautions and am part of two COVID safe communities. However, I know that the large majority of the population no longer cares and does, unwillingly or not, participate in a lack of overall health safety for me and my family, as well as their own safety. But I'm not going to isolate, I'm going to take precautions to continue to be part of community. I believe folding people in together is the only way forward.
My brother is a huge fan of Elon Musk, which is so gross and awful. I used to shut down conversations about this but I've decided to be open, honest, and present with him about this. I check Elon's behavior to him, let him know that I believe his actions are on purpose and that my brother is making nazi sympathizer choices with his thoughts and actions. I also let him know that when it's ready to fight, I want him to be on our side, which he states he would be (idk). That's all I can do. Keep communication open. Keep connection open. Make these sympathizers not fear "the others" because I am willing to participate and provide and talk.
Now, none of this means I'm willing to lay down as terrible beliefs ravage our society. I am still able to be critical of others choices and I will defend myself and my family against harm if need be. I just believe that the core of most of the harm and violence comes from the top. I believe that people are emotionally thrown for a loop when they come to a conversation with fear-based hostility and find community-based hospitality in response.
I will continue to advocate for the people who are being brutalized our community. I believe, however, that they need to hear us first. They need to see us as human, and I think part of that is showing them that we see them as human. Yes, flawed scared scapegoating humans that need to be held responsible for their actions if and when they participate in violence. I'm not talking about conceding or finding "common ground" in our beliefs beyond the basic humans need food water shelter (and love if they're about that). I may acknowledge their fear, the influences that they have been under, and the things surround their hate. I will try to come at it at as loving as a place as I can, always reminding myself that they were once babies shaped to view the world as this big scary thing filled with monsters, taught by the actual monsters who want to control everything.
Again, I'm only recommending this if you have the energy to do so. I think a lot of people have tried for years and then get burned out. I get that, I think getting stronger within your own community would help grow the ability to then reach outside and communicate. At the same time, my friend and I were talking about how some people are just "front of house" and some are "back of house" and the front of house people can be the ones interacting with society and the back of house can build the inside. We don't all have to do everything, let's find out strengths and build on those to get through, and maybe even past, the shit show we find ourselves living in today.
That being said, I feel like I have turned a new leaf in that I largely refuse to contribute to in-fighting discussions. In my mind, we are all in a race against the 1% but they have tricked us into thinking we are in a race with each other. I have decided to let go of the race. I have decided that whether they fear, pity, hate, whatever me, I'm going to value "the opposition" as people and when they are able to figure out who we should be actually fighting, I will be there happy to provide resources and supplies that I have in the aid of this goal. Until then, I'll be around.
The isolation that has been bred since long before I was born has just destroyed a sense of community, something that I yearn so much for. I know that people do things that bring me harm. For instance, I still take many COVID precautions and am part of two COVID safe communities. However, I know that the large majority of the population no longer cares and does, unwillingly or not, participate in a lack of overall health safety for me and my family, as well as their own safety. But I'm not going to isolate, I'm going to take precautions to continue to be part of community. I believe folding people in together is the only way forward.
My brother is a huge fan of Elon Musk, which is so gross and awful. I used to shut down conversations about this but I've decided to be open, honest, and present with him about this. I check Elon's behavior to him, let him know that I believe his actions are on purpose and that my brother is making nazi sympathizer choices with his thoughts and actions. I also let him know that when it's ready to fight, I want him to be on our side, which he states he would be (idk). That's all I can do. Keep communication open. Keep connection open. Make these sympathizers not fear "the others" because I am willing to participate and provide and talk.
Now, none of this means I'm willing to lay down as terrible beliefs ravage our society. I am still able to be critical of others choices and I will defend myself and my family against harm if need be. I just believe that the core of most of the harm and violence comes from the top. I believe that people are emotionally thrown for a loop when they come to a conversation with fear-based hostility and find community-based hospitality in response.
I will continue to advocate for the people who are being brutalized our community. I believe, however, that they need to hear us first. They need to see us as human, and I think part of that is showing them that we see them as human. Yes, flawed scared scapegoating humans that need to be held responsible for their actions if and when they participate in violence. I'm not talking about conceding or finding "common ground" in our beliefs beyond the basic humans need food water shelter (and love if they're about that). I may acknowledge their fear, the influences that they have been under, and the things surround their hate. I will try to come at it at as loving as a place as I can, always reminding myself that they were once babies shaped to view the world as this big scary thing filled with monsters, taught by the actual monsters who want to control everything.
Again, I'm only recommending this if you have the energy to do so. I think a lot of people have tried for years and then get burned out. I get that, I think getting stronger within your own community would help grow the ability to then reach outside and communicate. At the same time, my friend and I were talking about how some people are just "front of house" and some are "back of house" and the front of house people can be the ones interacting with society and the back of house can build the inside. We don't all have to do everything, let's find out strengths and build on those to get through, and maybe even past, the shit show we find ourselves living in today.
Jan 31, 2025
Rec
š¤itās genuinely very hard for me to be mad at another personāunless they are genuinely being unreasonable and deliberately hurtful towards me. but even so, they usually have their own reasons
everyoneās allowed to live differently and make different decisions based on how they grew up and grew into the person they are, and i think understanding how inherently different we all are from each other is actually very importantānot enough people grapple with that, we donāt actually sit down and comprehend that before reacting and objecting other people
i also think we need to be more comfortable with saying āi understand why you think this is the case, i just donāt agree with you, and thatās totally okā
everyoneās allowed to live differently and make different decisions based on how they grew up and grew into the person they are, and i think understanding how inherently different we all are from each other is actually very importantānot enough people grapple with that, we donāt actually sit down and comprehend that before reacting and objecting other people
i also think we need to be more comfortable with saying āi understand why you think this is the case, i just donāt agree with you, and thatās totally okā
Top Recs from @antifabricated
Rec
š£undoubtedly my favorite conversational invocation. i use it a lot and i love to hear it.
imploring someone to tell you more shows such deep interest, attention, and love! curiosity is always the answer; learn more before you pass a judgment.
imploring someone to tell you more shows such deep interest, attention, and love! curiosity is always the answer; learn more before you pass a judgment.
Nov 7, 2024
Rec
thereās something quite melancholy and cathartic about it, like wow, Iām old enough and Iāve been living in this neighborhood long enough to start to be recognized as a familiar face. i love that i can walk into my favorite coffee shop and be greeted as a friend, by baristas who know exactly my coffee particularities but donāt frown if i want something different from my usual order. it feels especially comforting on days i miss home and feel kind of alone, kind of afraid of being an adult. being a regular is feeling seen and known even by relative strangers, with whom you can connect over a comforting drink or meal! this is just one of the ways i love to cultivate a sense of home and community in my coming-of-age yearsā itās so grounding to experience familiarity especially when youāre adjusting to living alone, recently moved to a new city, or otherwise needing to feel settled during tumultuous times!
Nov 11, 2024
Rec
š
i love being up early even when i donāt have morning plans. i can take my time enjoying breakfast, playing my little games, journaling, and stretching all without a rush. easing into the day and reveling in the quiet, gentle morning hours is a blessing! time feels more spacious!
Nov 9, 2024